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Re Justice, misogyny and Police. I am dealing with a horrible situation at the moment.
I had to deal with the police at one stage because of it. And their response was horrendous. Additionally, this past week, I learnt that there is a formal inquiry going on in my state into police conduct re domestic violence responses, and as stories come out (re DV responses AND SO MUCH MORE), it seems that my experience is completely not unique (which, while deeply saddening and horrifying to learn the scale on which this is, and has been, happening- both in the field with civilians and WITHIN the inner workings of the force - doesn't surprise me in the slightest. The responses I received from police seemed very clearly habitual and well practiced in the art of deflection, denial, gaslighting, auto defending perp, and more.) Anyway, it got me thinking for some reason about the Heard v Depp case . Join me on a little hypothetical. I wonder, if the case had been the complete opposite (which it never would be because, duh, but please humour me for a moment), ie: If Depp was a blonde bomshelle in her 90's, and Heard was a boy toy in his 30's/40's.... and the case played out exactly the same ....
Do you agree that it is extremely likely that in court:
The male would still win?
Kk, so from my experiences with the police (traffic/car accidents) YOU CANNOT QUESTION YOURSELF AT ALL. You have to be sure of yourself and firm in your facts of the situation. Any qualifying language you use will be used against you in a report- cops are not therapists, they are not there to make sure you are ok- that's for the EMT's. Cops are there to determine if a crime has been committed and if someone should be arrested or if violence is possible in this situation. Cops are also notoriously lazy, if you make it easy for them to write something off as no fault or to save them paperwork then they WILL TAKE IT. In the courts- you have to play the perfect victim (I know it doesn't exist but courts DON'T CARE). You have to be sharply dressed/look well to do, you have to be calm and composed, you have to be unwavering in your statement/testimony to maintain your credibility. YOU ARE NOT THERE FOR HONESTY. YOU ARE THERE TO NOT LIE AND TO PROTECT YOUR RIGHTS -NO ONE WILL BE ABLE TO FIGHT FOR YOU ON THE STAND, IN YOUR STATEMENT ETC UNLESS YOU LAWYER UP IMMEDIATELY. And even then, lawyers have their own priorities to try and win/settle a case and they are expensive af
Yes, it is likely the man would still win- but we've seen the strategies used to play against women in court and they are all designed to smear her and BREAK HER COMPUSURE to prove she's crazy and can't be trusted. So- to that end I say play your part as the 'perfect' victim, let them smear you for not being genuine- you're only a manipulative bitch if they didn't get what they wanted from you
Yup, he would. Lundy Bancroft talks about how courts disturbingly and blatantly discriminate against women because of good ole misogyny. "But he's attractive, and he was NICE to ME, a complete stranger with his future in my hands... SHE must be lying 🤷" *proceeds to give him a full pass and advocate for him*
It comes from both men and women. I have a coworker who was a domestic violence advocate/sponsor. Cool! Then I found out she has never been in any sort of abusive relationship... That she often sided with the men in those situations cause she didn't like the women for their attitude and probably looks... That shes a cool unique girl for doing bdsm.... That she automatically defended a blatantly creepy incel at work, until she found out he talked shit on her... And shes a Depp fan. 😬
The automatic defence and excusing of males, and automatic accusing/investigating of females is ugly and getting old. I'm tired of it.
I will never forget when an old coworker of mine found out she was pregnant with a boy, and started shit talking her infant girl. Saying she was going to be a manipulative little bitch who blames her brother and dad for everything... That was so, so fucking disturbing. And trust me, I try to keep a tab on that baby girl, from a distance. Her mom is clearly fucked up...