Catcalling

It's exactly that, they enjoy harassing women and want to because they're misogynistic, women exist to be hurt by them, they just rebrand it to make you feel crazy and mess up with you, had catcalling been as flattering as they claim they wouldn't be doing it in the first place.

I get cat called, I ignore it or I just shrug my shoulders but when they start following then I will become dismissive.

I have to deal with this nearly every day. I live downtown and walk to my gym and there's always presumably homeless men hanging around on the streets and saying things like "hey baby" when I walk past. It is so annoying. I'm always wearing headphones and ignore it. They don't actually think I'd be remotely interested in talking to them, they just enjoy harassing women for fun.

It's also really hard to talk to most men about this, they aren't able to understand that it's harassment, and say things like "I would love a bunch of random women to compliment me every day."

Oh goodness. Even as a teen I was very aggressive and confronted them, flipped them off etc.. I had a classic white van with at least 2 men pull up in front of my path and I immediately picked up the biggest rock on the ground, they saw this and immediately skrrted away. Stupid but I just wasn't afraid for some reason. It had instinctively caused me to developed a very intimidating way of walking, I was told by an ex once, so I have tried to unlearn that.

Another time, I got catcalled from a small construction site (just a standalone storefront type deal)... I actually turned around and walked right in there asking what that guy really wanted to say to me? They all denied it was them. It's a power move for sure but underneath that bravado they are just whiny little cowards who get no female attention so they feel they have nothing to lose I guess.

"Jeez, you can't even compliment a woman now!"

It was NEVER a compliment.

My favorite explanation for harrassment vs compliment was this:

"If another inmate who is bigger and stronger than you said these exact words to you in a prison shower... would you consider this a harmless compliment or feel threatened?"

Men usually try to say that's a tooootally different situation but it is not. A prison as a man and walking around alone outside as woman are both situations where harrassment is common and rapes and assaults are frequently happening. The person saying this to you is larger and stronger than you in both cases and thus represents a real threat.

The thing is: Men actually know this (even if it is just deep down). They just like harrassing us without consequences.

I was just reflecting on a bizarre catcalling memory recently. I was walking with my LVM boyfriend (he’s now been an ex for a long time), and two men shouted a lewd comment at me out of a car. My boyfriend started grinning. I was so confused by his reaction and thought maybe I misheard or misunderstood what had happened. No - he told me he’d never dated a woman attractive enough to get catcalled.

So this moment that felt so degrading and dangerous to me was giving him a thrill and ego boost. I couldn’t believe how he instantly saw the situation in such a twisted and self-promoting way.

In retrospect, it was just another reminder that men see women as objects to boost their own status, and not as humans.

I also think a part of the catcalling power game that is underestimated is how they choose to NOT catcall some women. They put you under stress either way. They put themselves into a chooser position. They create this heiriarchy. And their heiriarchy is pedophilic and eurocentric.

I think it should be outlawed. Personally I ignore and dress down most of the time. I know what I CAN Look like and use this Only to my benefit. Not to entertain strangers in the streets. I do not perform for males WHO did NOTHING for me in my day to day life. I save my energy, money and effort for my career and romantic interests.