having high standards isn’t just about men and friendships

To me "having high standards" ultimately translates to having compassion for yourself and your own needs and prioritizing them when possible.

Women are gaslit to sacrifice themselves and put their own needs last in this society so much that going against that almost feel criminal sometimes and is very hard to unlearn. It also plays an important role outside of relationships, friendships and jobs and comes up in many little ways every day, e.g. when you try to convince yourself that it's okay to spend money because you deserve a new mattress that doesn't hurt your back instead of taking the old but free one from some cousin who is moving. Women who grew up poor probably know what I mean. Even though I'm financially comfortable now it took me a long time to allow myself to buy shoes that last and don't hurt my feet instead of the cheapest crap possible because - compared to what I had as a child - even the cheapest shoes felt like a luxury because they were new instead of hand me downs.

"I deserve this" and "my needs matter" can be hard things to learn as a woman.

Good on you for recognizing the need to change your situation, that's a HV quality that will serve you well in life.

I tutored to pay for university too, and it was the best job I could have had. Flexible hours, good wage (and in cash) and comfortable working conditions. It looks great on resumes and will get you far. Plus, you can do it in person and virtually.

If you like kids, research camp counsellor jobs in your area.

Other jobs could be remote work like bookkeeping or virtual assistant

Don't forget to network with your professors and folks on campus and ask them if they know of anyone hiring or any jobs. They're a fantastic source of intel and opportunity

I think research assistantships in your area of study are some of the best jobs you can get as an undergrad. They help a lot with future jobs and grad school prospects too, unlike a lot of shitwork (doordash, OF, waitressing, retail etc.) that doesn't really build much on your CV for your future.

You could be a paraeducator. That would probably give you the best experience for the career you're going into. If I were you I'd also take the CBEST if you haven't already. It's an easy exam. Once you have a Bachelor's and have passed the CBEST you qualify to be a substitute teacher (at least here in CA).

Is there any way you could secure a part time job on campus? There are also work study opportunities at colleges usually which help out with tuition a lot.

i feel you on not settling for jobs esp jobs that make you miserable. I’ve had to walk out on lots of toxic jobs including recently where I kept getting sexually harrassed. No job is worth your mental health.

I like DoorDash! Music in the car, most restaurant hostesses are female.