I never thought I'd ever need to worry about an arranged marriage but my grandma's friends want to set me up with their son and I didn't have the heart to tell her no. I probably won't get picked because they likely want someone who can speak our native language and cook Indian food and I can't do either. But I'm still nervous.
So i thought Id be meeting the guy with both our families in tow, but apparently he wants to meet me alone. How do I make it clear that I'm not going 50 50 without sounding like an entitled princess?
Let's back up here.
Boundaries are important. Also, listening to your own feelings, which are telling you not to do this, is also important. Saying no is being true to yourself. If you say no to things that you don't feel a 'fuck yes' about, you have more time and space for things that you actually want to do.
I know this isnt helpful, but you know...
You ARE entitled to a suitor's wealth, so go ahead and act like it. If he doesnt like it, then he and his parents dont have to pick you.
Who put this "entitled princess" idea in your head? You can't control scrotes so my advice is do not offer to pay and give the impression that scrotes normally pay so it's not even a question. If he asks to split it means he's a dusty and marriage will not rehabilitate them
Tell him straight up you’re expecting a provider. Watch his reaction. My friend does this and she says they usually start arguing with her that women are doing fine now and that he’s expecting 50/50 from the women. NEXT
Also ask questions like how does he envision his life with a partner, this will tell you whether he’s ready to be a husband and provider based on how he answers this. A lot of them don’t expect to be asked this and starts mumbling. This usually means he’s not ready. Although watch out for love bombers too. Some are really good at talking and can fool you easily so even if he says thing a you like, watch his actions.
I usually prefer the meetings with family too because you don’t know him so it’s safer if the family is there, and also you get to judge the family and see if they’re a good fit for you. I also like to see how they are around their family, whether they’re close or not. One guy I met straight up showed resentment towards his family which was an instant no for me because why are you agreeing to meeting women through your family if you hate them so much. Grow some balls