.png)
This post is prompted by the thread on askwomen, that place is a scrotey cesspool though and I have no desire to comment or participate on the site. I think the question was, how often do you receive oral and are you happy with the frequency? Lots of varied answers, with some saying they dislike it. Now I am not here to debate anyone on their sexual preferences or tell you that you're wrong for disliking it, I'd just like to share my own experience. I was never comfortable receiving oral, it felt embarrassing or like I was "asking for too much" but on the handful of occasions I did try it (with different partners) I did not like it at all. Felt like a wet, uncomfortable tickle. Could not comprehend how that feels good. I gave it a shot, I thought. I'm just someone who doesn't enjoy it. I reached that conclusion in 2019 at 19 years old, it's just not for me. I met my current boyfriend at the end of 2019, so we've been together 3 and a half years at this point. Let me just gush about him for a quick second before I get to my point. I've never loved anyone before him, I was never in any healthy relationship before him. The majority of my sexual experiences in my liberal pick me days were rough, painful, degrading. Void of respect, love or care. But I thought that's just what sex was, casual sex is cool, empowering, liberating right! You don't need to be in a relationship to have sex with someone. That's so old fashioned right! So it sounds a little cheesy, but my boyfriend and I don't have sex. We make love. And it is passionate, caring, tender, safe, wonderful experiences each time. We hadn't seen each other in 3 weeks (he travels for work) saw each other yesterday, went out for a nice dinner, gelato afterwards, a walk by the water front. When we got home, we made love, he would kiss my forehead and told me he loved me, how beautiful I was, how much he missed me. It was lovely. Yes I did sit on his face beforehand, but lemme tell y'all, it wasn't always like this! I was not always comfortable in this seat, I did not lay claim to the throne until about 6 months ago! If I dug through my diary, I could tell you the exact date and time. One random, snowy afternoon in January, I looked over to my unsuspecting boyfriend and asked him if he slept well last night, do you feel rested? I asked.
"Yes...?" he answered. Little did he know, the day I had in store for him.... I'm not sure what it was on this particular day, boredom, curiosity, horniness? I had a feeling that if we tried different techniques and the right rhythm, maybe I would enjoy it. Now I will spare you the intimate details, but he basically played dance dance Revolution on my clit for 2 hours. What a trooper. It was a lot of triangle, triangle, square, circle. More pressure! Okay less pressure. Okay let's try square, circle, triangle! Ultimately, we found the combo that works for me. And now I am a devoted convert. Again, like I said at the beginning, I'm not telling anyone to do anything they don't wanna do. But maybe, juuuuuust maybe, one day you'll be comfortable to try something again with the right person and you might just change your mind. Thank you for coming to my Ted Talk ❤️
I'm happy for you, Queen.
I'll never forget the first time I was about to have sex with my seemingly HV ex. I said "I want to f#ck you so bad" because after being with so many pornsick scrotes that's what I thought men loved to hear. He said "I don't want that. I want to make love to you. Because I am so deeply in love with you." And oh my goodness, there was such a difference. I'd never had a man make love to me before. It was slow and sweet- none of that jackhammer nonsense, no pornified contortions. Many would call it vanilla, but it was anything but.
Unfortunately, after about 3 months he started displaying LV symptoms. Too bad, so sad. I cut him loose.
At least I know now what kind of sex to expect, and I won't settle for anything else.
May your M remain HV.
All the best.
I used to think I didn't like it, now I know most men are just terrible at it.
My first boyfriend was LV and pornsick and never went down on me the entire three years we were dating. It made me feel ashamed of my body and that I must be undesirable and off-putting. That I was a hole he liked to finish in, not a woman worthy of receiving love and pleasure. Of course he pressured me into giving him blowjobs that I did not enjoy or feel comfortable with.
It was revolutionary dating men after him who not only were willing to go down on me, but who enjoyed it and begged me to let them pleasure me. I would go so far as to say that a man who does not enjoy giving his lady oral is not HV! I love how my boyfriend asks to go down on me and gets very aroused pleasuring me - as it should be.
Love this for you!
Unfortunately, I've slept with multiple men but none of them have ever made me cum and were all pornsick.
Could've had a better time with my vibrator hell even staring at the wall lmao. It was awful. Now I know to only wait until after commitment and if they can't please me properly then snip SNIP
100% this. It takes time and the right person to make it work.
Demand the time and effort be put in!
Oral might not be every woman's thing, but clitoral stimulation in general is big for most women I've talked to. If he doesn't know that and isn't interested in pleasuring you that way, he's for the bin. And yes, he should take the time to figure out your body and not give up after 2 minutes of lazy tongue / thumb flicking. My partner has been nothing but patient, attentive and loving with me and my body too. I love receiving oral from him. Doesn't hurt that he's really good at it too, and enjoys it himself.
I love receiving oral and only have partners that do it every time we make love (without asking. They love it.) I didn't like it when I was young, but had a dedicated partner in my early 20s that broke me of that. He taught me to prioritize myself, not fixate on his pleasure, and mentally and physically relax.
If you want to continue your exploration of oral and the female orgasm, check out OMGYES.com