How should we ask men for cash before we go on dates with them?

I disagree about the makeup part.

Our bone structures are prettier, our conversations are male focused, our bodies are appealing - makeup helps, but we definitely should still get paid just to show up for dates, etc.

I'm not talking about sex.

Ummm I was just giving examples about making an effort and what it could possibly contain. You listed make up yourself first: "Also, the man should compensate the woman for the money she spends on makeup, manicures, hair treatments, etc. in preparation for going out with him."

They are confussing wanting a provider for being a escort.

I hear what you're saying, and I agree that we shouldn’t charge friends and family for spending time with us.

However, I find the more stable I become in my career, the more I expect financially from men who want to date me. As I mentioned in my previous post, I earn $70/hour at my day job. It's not particularly high or particularly low for my city, but it does provide a benchmark for how much I'd like to be compensated.

It feels wrong to me that a man can expect me to provide my labor and time for free when he 1) doesn't know me, and 2) wants to court me. I think he should show me upfront (before I start preparing for the date) that he is worth my time.

The only reason women asking men for money seems "tacky" is that dusties have deemed it tacky. Steve Harvey says "gold digger" is a term made up by men so women are shamed into not expecting a thing from men. I can't say I disagree.

A female friend of mine who lives in L.A. says it costs her $100 just to get out the door, and a man should front her at least $100 if he wants to set up a date. Again, I can't say I disagree. And no, she is not a sex worker. She is a 30-something career woman like me, looking for a husband.

If it costs the woman $100 to get her out of the door for the date, by that logic the man should arrive with an expensive bouquet of flowers or a gift worth over $100. Rather than, for example, handing her $100 cash at the door… which any LVM can do.

If we’re really counting tit-for-tat like this where she’s worth say $100/hr then the man should also spend $300 for a 3 hour date with her. Again, instead of just handing her cash. Like an investment?

But then I urge on the side of caution with this logic: do you want to come across as a property investment? and less of a romantic partner to a man and more of a “worker” or his employee since he’s paying for you and your services? This only perpetuates the idea that women are to be purchased and disposed. That‘s the tricky part.

I think it also starts a conversation on why is taking a woman 100 to get to a date? (besides, transportation but I only date men who I already know so they pick me up) A woman should not be that concerned about her appareance if the point of FDS is to de center men. IMO.

Read the handbook on scrotations.

IMHO, I think this is a great way to actually waste more time with cheaper guys and get more attached to them. Being familiar with both versions, I think the European way is a bit too casual in that many times you go out with someone in your own circle without even establishing that its a romantic date, and it stays casual always while morphing into a LTR with kids that no one was ever really clear about the direction they were going in. You never get to see them put their best foot forward romantically because its not expected at all, and I think they take you for granted easier. The men are extremely passive and it's a bit pathetic.

Imagine taking several weeks just to discover a dealbreaker red flag, and by that time you know his life history, his friends, and his dog, you feel sorry for him cause he is okay. When you could have met 4 other men and compared notes on how they treated you without getting distracted by feelings. And based on the numbers game you would find someone compatible sooner than later, rather than spend so much time on several dead ends or finally settle with someone "good enough". I think a pitfall of the European state of mind is worrying so much about how others will judge you. If your goal is to find the best man for you as soon as possible its different than if youre just "going with the flow" and if he shows up cool.

But ultimately it's your life and the expectation to be loyal to someone you hardly even know is a bit ridiculous, IMHO.

Girl, no. If he’s from online he has MORE to prove, not less. A phone call is easier than wasting your precious morning running chores with some dude. Coffee is a chore, a pickmeup you buy while off doing other things. It’s not a date and any man who thinks coffee is a date is negative value. No generous, kind, thoughtful, wonderful man will think coffee is an acceptable date for a woman he adores. Like. Be so serious.

If you have reservations about a man then have a phone call and then decide. But if you cringe at the idea of going on a date with him or think you’ll have a bad time then DON’T date him. It’s that simple. Why advocate for cheap, low effort dates when we all know good men don’t play those kind of games? A man offering chores or walks or coffee as a “date” is negging you and showing you that’s the best you’ll get. Like if you’re a libfem pickme who’s so desperate for male attention that you think being treated like shit is better than being ignored then go for it! But why are you here. Fds women require basic, bare minimum respect and that means only dating men who are putting in actual effort and bringing value into our lives.

Have higher standards, girl. You’re wasting your own life by chasing nv scrotes.

Right! She’s just wasting her life chasing useless, unworthy men. I’m so tired of libfems coming on here and pretending like casual dating and hookups are really where the “good” men are. These women need to read the handbook.