Your thoughts on having children?

Nope, for many reasons. The main one being that I just would rather do so many other things with my time than raise a child. I like my sleep. Pregnancy sounds horrifying, like my worst nightmare. I don’t think I could bring another girl into this world knowing she will be a victim of misogyny, or a boy who will benefit from women’s oppression and who will most likely hurt other women at some point. I also just think it’s selfish to bring someone into this world who has no choice in the matter. My mom thought she had no other purpose in her life other than to have babies so now I have to work most of the time to live when I didn’t even ask to be here. If I get into a relationship again I’m getting a bisalp so I have no chance of experiencing that.

I used to want that life. It was when I was a bit more naive about how men are.

I grew up with a single mom and my dad is a deadbeat. I don't want that. I have a good stepdad now. But it's not guaranteed you will find a good guy.

Even if I found a good man who wants a family, I fully believe men can be a good husband OR a good father. They literally can't do both!

So I'd rather just have a good husband and not test it to see if he'll also make a good father.

Plus I want that DINK lifestyle. I want to travel and have nice things with my husband (if I find a hvm to marry)

No because I never wanted kids since I was a kid. I don't enjoy taking care of kids, and I don't want to take on that responsibility. Realistically, I would end up doing the vast majority of childcare and grown-child care.

Also, by having a kid, I'd only be ensuring that they'll suffer and die. There's no guarantee that they'll be happy or healthy. More likely, they'll end up like me, working a job they hate.

No, I don't. Why? Because I don't want to (be a mother, be pregnant, etc.)

If you cannot imagine raising those children alone, don't have them. We cannot trust males to even help raise their own kids these days.

my thoughts are: no, thank you.

there's way too much people on the planet already. i can barely afford existing as a solo person, let alone a solo mother. HVM in my opinion are too rare for me to even bother. i think if i ever decide to raise another human, i'll try adoption. and if i can't do that for some reason (it's very difficult actually), i'll direct my caring energy into taking care of children some other way.

No. Never did. I knew even as a child I was not mother material. In my 40s now- zero regrets.

Hell no I'm childfree and sterilized via a bisalp and I finally have so much peace and safety in my own body. I grew up traumatized and abused already and have no maternal instinct. pregnancy and giving birth are horrifying on so many levels(uterine prolapse, losing teeth, your sight etc) and I refuse to ruin my nice body. Not to mention I need at least 9 hours of sleep, freedom, time, disposable income and a quiet clean home. oh and I want my future husband all to myself and bang him whenever I want lol

I'd love to have children someday (planning on adoption once I'm a homeowner and have more financial savings), but the options for women who want to raise a family are pretty bleak: 1. Find and marry a true HVM who will be a responsible and devoted father (good luck 🙄) 2. Find and marry another lesbian/bi woman who also wants children (statistically less likely than in a heterosexual relationship)

3. Adopt/use a sperm donor as a single woman (monumentally difficult, expensive, and potentially physically debilitating) My own mom was (and is) a wonderful mother despite dealing with chronic health issues and an emotionally abusive husband, and I want to honor her efforts by giving the best possible life to my own future daughters, but the prospects are just so discouraging.

I believe unless you are wealthy or financially very comfortable and you see your children's happiness and success in life as a priority, and you are part of a community with people you can trust where your daughters can play at peace then this world has nothing to offer a child.

I was never truly happy because I didn't come from a family full of succesful people but worthless scrotes and pickme's. Mother was an emotional neglectful pickme and father was a lazy scrote so I never had the feeling I had good parents, just breeders who don't have a clue on how an individual mind works, I was more like a biological pet.

With other words don't have children if you just want a mini me, or so that you can feel like a woman or experience unconditional love because children should not be there for you, you should be there for them.

Too many women have children and not look after them properly because they just had them because they want a human that are theirs. or just to continue the bloodline.

I always believed that children need life time teachers not parents, leaving the house should feel like leaving the nest, a natural progress.

Unfortunately I've seen lionesses and birds raise their offsprings better than mothers. Simply because most humand have children for the wrong reasons.

And personally I have a heart of a mother because I had to be my own mother growing up but I don't have the finances to make sure my daughter has everything she wants so unless that happens I don't want children, they must be home schooled until they are developed enough to defend themselves against bullies, I want them to enroll in private school, the best universities and you need plenty of money for that.

I always get slack for this but I rather have a spoiled daughter than a daughter that holds on to the short end of the stick because I put her in this world.

No kid asks to be born so you have no right to make them go through hardships, you must create a good quality life first, forget men because children don't need a father. They need a mother who is a teacher first and a community who sees them as family.

Hell no.

Short answer- no

Back when I thought I wanted children, I already decided to do it on my own. I’ve known too many women in my life shackled to a deadbeat or abusive man because they had a child together. Or you think the dudes okay but then his mask slips once you’re pregnant. So I always thought I’d go to a sperm bank had I decided to. But then I was asking myself the tough questions. Such as, would I be capable of taking care of a disabled child? My answer was again, no. I know several women who had children with severe autism or behavioural problems, disabilities, etc. Their lives are a living hell. Forget the whole 18 years and then having a self sustaining adult by the end of it. Nope. Try the rest of your life and then having to figure out what to do with the child once you pass away. One woman comes to mind, had 2 healthy children, they’re both in their late teens so they were almost out of the house. Then she had a baby with a scrote who had a micro dick, called her names and constantly cheated on her. Child is severely autistic. Is a mute. Will never speak. He just grunts. Can never be potty trained. I babysat him when he was about 8 and he fought me while changing him, got away from me and smeared feces EVERYWHERE and all over himself. Fought me while trying to wash him. I only watched him occasionally but that was that woman’s every day life. FOREVER. I couldn’t risk it man.

I'd love to have one child but only if I can conceive them with a great man who actually wants to be a father... And that one is already wishful thinking lol

I've never wanted children, ever since I was a kid I knew it - younger kids annoyed me, I had a panic attack in class when the teacher talked about pregnancy, when I played the sims I always just had a single woman - I tried to make a family once just to see what it was all about and as soon as the child was born I stopped playing lol. I feel disgust when I see a baby. When I say I would rather die than be pregnant my friends tell me I'm awful, but they just don't understand. I really would. I'm grateful for that, I don't feel worry over possibly not finding a husband.

I wonder if there’s any HVM who don’t want kids

In a perfect world, yes. In the real world, no.

I'm a grandmother in the last stretch of raising my youngest, soon to become an adult. If I had something like FDS and any info about child free life, I probably still would have had children, but waited until later to start and worked harder to have them closer together. But I completely understand why women don't want children.

In a better world, maybe. But hell no for this lifetime.

Pregnancy and childbirth are uncomfortable at best and deadly at worst. Some women have lifelong health issues because of it. Healthcare sucks for women. Doctors love to push unnecessary surgeries for their own wallet and convenience.

No guarantee that the child will have zero health and mental problems, too. An acquaintance had a boy with hydrocephalus. It was very hard on her knowing that the kid wouldn't live long no matter what she did and how much money she spent. He passed away when he was 12.

Even if the kid is healthy, society sucks. Younger and younger kids watch porn these days, little boys raping other kids and babies getting more and more common, idiot adults trying to normalize porn and prostitution, trans bullshit, pedophiles lurking in the internet, rape culture, misogyny from family and friends...

Even if the kid grows into an adult with a healthy mind and body, life is hard af. There's no guarantee that it won't become harder for their generation.

I'd like to but won't mind if I never do. First, endometriosis so shit is expensive out of the gate. Pregnancy is bad enough. Also, my sister is a doctor and she pointed out how much is kept secret about it. That miscarriages happen a lot more than it's publicly known, how women get hurt a lot giving birth and other horror stories. But no one wants to talk about it. It's all babies and lollipops and bullshit.

Not only have I never wanted children, I spent most of my life actively sort-of hating them. I found them annoying, found most women who were mothers to be boring and had the life drained out of them, and firmly believed it was patriarchal indoctrination and idiotic romance movies that made most women want kids in the first place. Who would want to waste their day/ energy/ life on a kid when there's travel, hobbies, friendships, projects, love, knowledge, animals, etc? Who would want to wreck their body? I even have a short story published in which I practically mock my siblings- all of them have children- for being boring and preoccupied with the myopic, biological function of parenting. I have always avoided dating anyone who wanted children, too. I wore my child-free flag freely and proudly. In my late 30s, I had to have an ultrasound while at the ER, and the physician informed me I can never have children-- the child wouldn't make it past the first trimester. I practically threw a party when I heard that news and became a little less stressed out about/obsessed with protection with my boyfriend at the time. Phew!

Then, lo and behold, I became pregnant. My doctor agreed with the ER physician: there is no way in hell this will get past the first trimester. They said, ignorantly assuming the news would upset me: "Don't get your hopes up. Expect a miscarriage any day now." I thought - okay, cool! No need to get an abortion! Swish!

Hahaha, plot twist: I now have a one year old. I am in my 40s. Before my child, I lived the fullest, most AMAZING life ever. I have tons of education, multiple degrees, traveled everywhere, experienced great romantic love stories with men and women all over the world, built a group of best friends who are closer to me than family, attended and threw epic dance parties, published books, made my own business, excelled at sports-- really, if I found out I was going to die in a week, I'd feel like I did everything and more and would be ready. But, believe it or not, having a kid is one of the best things that ever happened to me. I cannot believe it. And I'm saying this as a single mother, by the way- I voluntarily left her father but have a good support system thanks to my solid group of girlfriends and my family and I financially do very well.

If you want children but don't have any yet, believe me, it is great but not in the way you would think and not in the way they show in the movies. It's a transcendental experience- you have to go through it to get what's so great about it. Also, pregnancy was fascinating even with all my complications. Despite all my feminist education and academia and body workshops and blah blah, I knew nothing about the female body until I went through pregnancy. It's a crime how little we know about our own bodies.

If you don't want children, I 100% understand how you feel because that was me for almost forty years. You will not get it no matter what, and that's fine. I am feeling a sort of psychic fracture right now remembering how much I despised and could not understand motherhood such a short time ago and but currently feeling the juxtaposition with the genuine fulfullment and peace flowing through me having my little daughter stretched out on my lap, asleep on me right now. I have tears in my eyes thinking I almost didn't have this life. If it was up to me, this would never have happened.

If I could, I'd have a second one, hahahaha.

The end.

i believe i've found a HVM...and he does not want children. so there's that.

I can't do it. Big props to mothers, single or not because it's very taxing, unappreciated job. The cost of living is going up, wages aren't increasing, men are fucking worthless at best and dangerous to women and children alike.

It's just not for me. Especially since I know I'm mentally ill with ADHD. So I wouldnt even be a good mom

Nope. In fact, I believe having children is morally reprehensible. It's the ultimate act of narcissism and selfishness. Basically, women have kids to prove their worth in a misogynistic world, and it never ends well for them. Mommies today expect everyone to kiss their asses, even though they cannot afford to feed, clothe, or educate them and think they will be the exception to being a single parent (WRONG). It's just gross and offensive.

Yes, I will be having children. I want to have at least 3. I think having a family is beautiful and I’m lucky enough to have an amazing man in my life with whom to start one. I’ve already discussed with my boyfriend that I will be a stay-at-home mother while our children are young, and that daycare is absolutely of the question. He understands that it is his role to provide for a family AND help out around the house. I’ve had no strategic incompetence issues out of him and am confident in his maturity. He is always cooking dinner and cleaning up after himself as he should! I am actually super excited for us to get married and start a family.

I’ve always wanted kids and only started doubting that when I started becoming more radfem, because I was worried I’d end up being a ‘breaking mom’. Now, that I have a great man in the picture it’s so much more appealing.

I was also worried about how we as rad-leaning women will be able to pass on our ideology if most of us don’t have children. As individuals, I don’t expect everyone to have kids bc that’s just unrealistic and not even ideal, but it’s going to be very hard to keep the current, updated opinions about women’s rights when most of the children will be born to very religious and maybe not the most tolerant of people.

The fertility rate is dropping everywhere and if we intend to keep any women’s rights maintained, feminists will have to have children and pass on their way of life. If we let religious zealots and trad couples become the only ones producing the people of the future eventually they’re going to outnumber everyone else.

One thing I think that liberal feminist (and maybe all feminists) never anticipate is that the fruitful will inherit the earth and they will impose all their beliefs on us once again. As we can see already they are very powerful at undoing our rights and we can’t count on converting their children to our values. We’ll just be right back where we started in another 200 years.

Of course, it won’t be possible for everyone to have children with the state of men right now. That’s the saddest part because many women do want marriage and family. It’s natural to both sexes simply based on biology. It’s sickening that scrotes behave the way they do because they are standing in the way of everyone’s happiness, not just their own.