When I moved to a new apartment I hired a reputable moving company. One of the guys who was moving my stuff felt the need to put his hand on my shoulder when he made a joke. It was for a few seconds and I froze. It felt so inappropriate and icky. I bet he wouldn't have done that when my parents were around. In fact, he kept his physical distance when they were around. And later on asked me if I was single. I've completely stopped dating completely because men have kissed me without warning. Back in my pickme days I went on a breakfast date with a guy. As soon as I got into his car his kissed me so fast (Post-FDS me would never get into a man's car now). I felt sexually assaulted. I just sat down and was still adjusting in my seat when it happened, there was no mood or romance. Like seriously WTF!? American / Americanized men of all ethnicities and cultural backgrounds always find a way to touch you or try to kiss you on a first date, or just in general. I find it so alarming. Perhaps because I come from a conservative culture. Idk. Come to think of it I find American men very rapey. I've never dealt with this in any of the other countries I've lived in or dated in.
As much as I do my best to stay away from men and don't date, it's unavoidable like in the situation of moving apartments. What do you ladies do to avoid or handle these situations? Men in my home country would NEVER touch a woman unsolicited. It's the same with most other countries I've visited
This irks me because they never touch other men or try to hug them after the first time meeting.
I didn't know this is specific to America but I'm American. It's happened to me a lot too.
A lot of our movies has a man just suddenly kissing a woman and forcing himself on her, and it's always shown to be some kind of sexy thing. Like she was just waiting for this moment for her whole life. Then some emotional intense music plays and they have sex.
Even if I like the man, that would be super off-putting behavior to me.
You're onto something because I too have been kissed without warning twice (second dates, both!) and was SHOCKED - but I have never had anything remotely similar happen when I was living abroad (I'm American). I blame the ubiquity of pickup artists, a uniquely American scourge, who tell men to basically ignore their empathy, respect, and intuition about women's boundaries and steamroll over them as an effective 'strategy' to get sex.
Mainstream U.S. culture is rape culture. Don't let anyone fool you into thinking otherwise.
I find East Asian cultures to be a lot less touchy, physically speaking. Chinese, Korean, and Japanese men, in general (there are always mentally ill exceptions, of course), do not go around touching women they barely know in public. Most of them would be taken aback if a woman they barely knew tried to touch them.
Which other countries have you dated/lived in? I'd love to hear positive examples.