.png)
In the spirit of a recent post discussing how OP hadn’t met a married woman whose life they’d want, I had a bit of an existential crisis. I grew up emulating and envying smart, beautiful put-together women. Now, when I look around, I don’t seem to see as many of those.
Many of the smart women I meet at work (I’m doing a postgrad) are brilliant but not very traditionally attractive so I look up to them in some ways but not fully.
And then the beautiful women I thought were smart years ago have now mostly given up careers to begin having families with guys who aren’t very attractive or interesting. So even though I’d like to be that beautiful (for my own vanity), their lives similarly look unappetizing to me.
I am left feeling lost without a compass and wondering maybe I’ll just have to look up to myself. I hope that doesn’t sound arrogant.. any glamorous educated radfems out there who aren’t pickmes that I can look up to?
I think it's okay to admire certain things about other people, but you would be setting yourself up for disappointment if you put one person on a pedestal and try to emulate their entire life.
Someone who is not you is likely to do something you don't agree with sooner or later.
At the end of the day, you have to live your own life. Learn from others, yes - but it wouldn't be good to take that too far.
Though I guess in my wildest fantasies, I would love to have Phryne Fisher's life, but that's a fictional character. 😁
It's hard to find a person you'd want to emulate fully. What's wrong with admiring bits and pieces from different people and incorporating it into your best self?
Ya know, I agree. Some of the most beautiful women I went to school with are now married to downright ugly dudes. I think it says a lot about their self esteem. I want an attractive partner cuz I’m also attractive. I want an educated partner, too. I think sometimes we have to be who we wish more people were.
SISTER. LOOK UP TO YOURSELF. You are beautiful, intelligent and well rounded. You are the shiz. Knowing your own worth and admiring your own strengths is ESSENTIAL to being a queen. Do not ever think that is arrogant.
It’s a HUGE privilege to be able to give up a career to have a family. A lot of women with children have to work full time AND take care of a family at home. The women you alluded to may have better husbands than you realize if they’re able to support a family on a single income.
Smart women spend less time on looking attractive therefore don't come across as "beautiful".