.png)
I've been dwelling on something that happened years ago, because a few friends I ghosted back then have recently come back into my life. I'm not sure if I should let it go and let them back in, or if I'm justified in keeping my distance.
When I broke up with my ex, even though it was amiable, I blocked him on every platform, because I firmly believe in a prolonged period of no-contact afterwards for the cleanest possible break. I had also recently moved across the country, so there was almost no chance I'd run into him in person either.
A few months later, a whole handful of different friends (who didn't really know each other, all of them independently) came crawling out of the woodwork after not having spoken to or messaged me at all in months, to send me updates about my ex - they had all seen a social media post that could have implied he was dating someone new. They sent it to me to ask if I had seen it and if I knew anything and to let me know.
For one, I knew it couldn't possibly be what they thought it was, because the "new girl" was actually the then-girlfriend of one of my ex's best friends. For another, I obviously didn't think we'd stay single forever, so it would only make sense that someone eventually moves on first, but we blocked and didn't speak so we wouldn't have to know all about it.
I ghosted each of the "friends" who came out of nowhere to thrust the information in my face. I raged to my best friend about it because I found it so insanely callous and insensitive. I struggled to understand what the purpose of them even telling that to me was. It didn't seem like that information could've been helpful or beneficial to me at all. It only felt like they were looking for drama and a reaction, and I was really upset with all of them. I still don't understand what else it could have possibly been.
I ghosted, and I never gave an explanation, but those friends hadn't spoken to me for so long anyways that I don't think they even noticed. It certainly doesn't seem like they did, now that we all happened to end up in the same city once more. They're all too happy to reach out and reconnect. They never knew that I was furious with them all this time. I'm not inclined to give them a piece of my mind because like I said, this happened so many years ago. I'm just wondering what the general take is: forgive and forget, or keep my distance? Was it really as bad as I made it out to be?
When I left my abusive ex husband while pregnant after completely being blindsided by his 180 personality flip I started posting about narcissistic abuse and domestic violence on Facebook. I was furious that I had been so callously tricked by this dumpster of a "man" and about to become a single Mother so posting about it was the only revenge/compensation/justice I could get.... Not my finest moment but still. My "friends" all messaged me to "check in/see how I was going"... Now that my posts are gone and I've moved on with life and doing much better some actually blocked me. Misery loves company. Other people like others pain to distract from their own shitty lives. Block and delete these so called "friends", your pain is their entertainment.
Avoid at all cost. These people are not your friends. They do seem to love gossip though.
So it seems all indications point to the fact that they have it in them to try to torment you by playing willfully ignorant like that. Have they ever added value to your life, or are they consistently subtracting from it? I suppose you could try to move on from this and stay friends, but getting over that breach of trust might be more trouble than it's worth. You may always have it in the back of your mind that they are trying to play games with you. Personally, I'd say keep ignoring them, but then again I'm quick to cut people who don't add value out of my life these days. Life is hard enough without having to be suspicious of those who we keep close to us.
These are low blows by these supposed friends imo
Your ex literally sent those vultures out to get you. 💀
Hell no, do not raise the dead. Let them remain ghosted. Believe who they showed you they are the first times.