What do you think about men who say sex work is real work?

I agree but the problem with that some of them are perverted and LV (low value) and paraphilic enough to revel in that sort of thing, even now. There are unlisted youtube videos of frat parties that I ran across by accident because I watch creators who report back with interviews of those who denounce sororities and fraternities and...these men are🤢 . These type of secret society shindigs or EVEN in Hollywood or Political circles ...well there are some P. Diddler types who deliberately do this and do not care. They have no souls nor do they care about themselves or others.

I'm happy for these men who have found their calling 🤗

JK. You're right. Few men are really straight. And male sexuality is deranged and revolting when not properly moderated by female influence.

But they won't admit that to you. They'll act disgusted by the idea of being used by another man and will stop talking to you. I just want these disease vectors to leave us alone.

Sad but true. Throughout my teens and 20s, I thought men and women could be friends. What actually happened was the men who "befriended" me did not approach our "friendship" with purely platonic intentions, or, in some cases, a basic sense of respect. Women can be friends with men. Men, for the most part, cannot be friends with women.

It took me nearly 30 years to realize this. However, I'd like to clarify that the opposite friendships I avoid are the very close kind (eg. best friends). Having a few "work friends" (mainly friends on the clock at work) of the opposite sex can be good as a networking strategy.

But outside of general instances, like work, hobbies, neighbors, opposite sex friends aren't a great idea.

I was friends with him cause he seemed nice and explained that he wanted nothing more than friendship and helped me move when I physically was not able to but he’s been giving me a strange vibe lately and although I’ve appreciated his help some things he says like that tell me that is he a man and will always act like one

You're right. They are suggestions if you want to keep your ass together in a world designed to destroy you as a woman. I see in another post you fully support Sex Work. Good luck only half assed following any of FDS.

I pick and choose what works for me from FDS. The self-improvent aspects, the boundaries aspect? Great. But I am neither a radfem nor a misandrist.

>They are suggestions

But not laws.

>if you want to keep your ass together in a world designed to destroy you as a woman

I refuse to live such a paranoid existence. Yes, being a woman can be hard. No. I will not assume by default I that anything and everything bad that happens = misogyny 100% of the time.

There is a lot more nuance irl.

That is great for you. We don't assume evEry bad thing is misogyny related either. And I'm not a misandrist.

all of that is really great for you. Keep it up.

Agreed. Sex work is hard work, but in the U.S. (and most of the world, I imagine), it doesn't offer the rights and protections that "real jobs" offer. That's why sex work is especially dangerous and undesirable.

I told him that I had a friend(not I am not longer friends with) who did sex work and had gotten raped and he didn’t have any response to that. I told him sex work is dangerios and not empowering

Sorry for the long reply, when I clicked my notifications it appeared that your comment was a reply to mine.

In any case, I don’t feel like it’s unethical for women to choose sex work, especially if they feel it’s the only way they can pay their bills and maintain their health. Demanding money from men in exchange for taking part in their sick fantasies seems fine to me. Women should only partake in interactions with men which benefit the women.

But I definitely feel that it’s unethical for men to be paying women for sex - primarily because they don’t see it the same way the women do. They believe that now they have paid, the woman owes them whatever they want. They believe the payment bypasses any consent that may otherwise be necessary (not that not paying stops rapists from raping). Unfortunately, law enforcement agrees with men in these cases.

It always comes down to men being the problem.

ETA: recently saw your 2nd comment.

Why singling out sex work? Why not also, say, retail workers who are victims or wage theft? Despite their status as employees, wage theft remains the biggest type of theft (at least in 🇺🇸). Part-time workers (the bulk of low wage workers) do not have many protections either. Most aren't entitled to unemployment and other fringe benefits.

Paid labor is neither empowering nor degrading. It simply is: paid labor. I personally do not see things in such a reductive way.

Second: tons of "real jobs" have similar (lack of) protections and recourses in regards SA as well. Even if one is in a "respectable" job (whatever that is), women still have a hard time being taken seriously.

I totally agree, all labor under capitalism is inherently exploitative, and many (MANY) low-wage jobs are abusive to employees. I’ve been talking lately with my coworkers about how we’ve been traumatized by low-wage jobs (and shitty bosses/shift leads who are power hungry).

I’ve personally not had the experience, or worked with anyone who did, of being SA’d in a normie job. But every single one of my coworkers at the club was assaulted at least once while working there. That’s why I say it’s exploitative for women in SW. It’s generally accepted as just “part of the job” and it shouldn’t be- most especially by society, but due to the stigma of SW, society discounts the realities of people who are in SW, whether they chose that job or are being forced into it by one method or another.

To your point though, I have absolutely been exploited by low wage jobs, I’ve been a victim of wage theft, and conned into signing up for a credit card at 18 with no knowledge or information being shared about how to build credit or even keep myself safe from the credit card company. I ended up in debt, and chose stripping as a way to get out. Then I was further traumatized by men, who thought they were buying me when they handed me money in exchange for my time and attention.

I don’t advocate for women to go that route because of the way it has harmed me.

I do advocate for women who are in that position to get better protections and employment benefits, because that would help ALL swers - including those being trafficked. It’s a hard job and societal views makes it much harder.