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I need advice on how to handle this situation
I made the mistake of dating someone from my work and the truth is that we broke up for various reasons 3 months ago and just at that time I went to work to another office in the UK while he stayed in the US and we haven't seen or spoken to each other.
The problem is that I have to go back to the office to work with him in January, we have many projects together and we are in the same team and we didn’t finished in the best terms
How do you recommend handling this situation or giving me some tips? I honestly believe that I haven't healed him completely and I'm afraid of what I will feel when I see him.
Hold your head high (fake it till you make it if you still aren't feeling great), do your job, and do your best to avoid office politics. Chances are he's buddied up with quite a few people from the office during your time away. Scope the situation first and give it time to see what "alliances" this guy has made.
No long water cooler chats, no hanging out and talking after work with people. Be as "absent" as you can be and do your work and go home. If you hear rumors, ignore ignore ignore. If there are rumors and they get too bad, go to HR.
But I would say your best bet is to act dignified and don't hang around people longer than you need to.
Aw damn, that is tough. I agree 3 months is not a lot of time to get over a relationship depending on how long and intense the relationship was.
Is there a way you could have meetings over Zoom without cameras on so his face doesn't trigger you? (If it was me, I would absolutely be triggered.) Or only communicate through work-channel DMs?
I would try to avoid in-person contact with him as much as possible. Anytime you guys need to provide physical materials, see if you can have another coworker deliver it to him, and other little things like that.
Work on getting transferred or look for another company to work at, if applicable...Just trying to think of all options you can consider so you don't lose your focus at work.
For the times you do have to interact with him in-person, stick to work-related subjects only, keep the meetings short, and...try to remember all the qualities of him you don't like and led to the breakup.
In my opinion, his biggest red flag is dating a coworker! He should know better than to risk his career AND romantic relationship by blending them together.
I understand you did the same thing by dating him, but I hope you've seen the error of your (and HIS) ways and use this wisdom as you move forward. He does not have your best interests at heart if he saw you as a dating prospect and not strictly a coworker. That screams, desperate, sloppy, and entitled to me. You deserve better. Next!
Go to HR and say you feel unsafe around him