Success stories of finding your HVM!

First of all, I'm sorry about your bad date! I've had plenty of those but there's hope for us yet ❤️ So I'm not going to call my boyfriend a HVM yet (only been 9 months and as we all know, vetting never stops) but it's only been green flags so far 😊 we're also not exactly what you're looking for (located in a city but a smaller one) but I thought I'd reply anyway to give you something positive!! When we met, I was 21 and he was 25 and we met through medical school (he is 2 years ahead of me, I started early 😊). We met because he's friends with the older siblings (his age) of my best friends, all of whom are in medical school. Prior to asking me out on a date, he helped me with school related things and just treated me like a princess in every way possible. He went out of his way to take care of and predict my needs. After a month of this, he formally asked me on a date to a really nice restaurant that held significance to both of us (Victorian mansion owned by a surgeon that was converted into a restaurant). After our initial date, he asked to take me out again and continued to plan dates for us. About a month after our first date, he asked me to be exclusive and I agreed. I knew from our other friends that he had not been seeing anyone since we met (even before our date) because he knew he wanted me to be his girlfriend but he did not want to rush me or the courting process. I also want to clarify that we didn't sleep together until about two months after becoming exclusive and he never pushed the issue. Not to be TMI, but our sex life is amazing and his generosity in other areas translates to the bedroom. Our relationship now is amazing. He still takes care of all of my needs and I am his top priority. I feel loved, supported, and cared for by him. He goes out of his way to show his love and since he's further along on our career path than I am, he does everything he can to help me and further my career. For example, he knows what specialty I'm interested in so when he was on rotation with an attending in that specialty, he talked me up to the attending and asked him for opportunities for me. That attending is now my mentor and I've been working with him for the past few months and he'll be cloaking me at my white coat ceremony 😊 One thing in particular that stands out to me is that he's always so genuinely happy for my success and he ensures that I don't make the same mistakes that he did. As for your last question, no he never tried to go 50/50. He's always paid for everything by his own choice and he's always been very generous to me 😊 He always says that what is his is mine and he's shown me time and time again that he truly means that (which touches my heart since it's exactly what my late father who was an HVM always told my mother and I). I hope this helps and brings some positivity! HVMs are rare but they are out there so never compromise and you'll find yours ❤️

I’m not in the US but I met my fiancé there, on tinder of all places (I know, I know but I was getting over a relationship and thought I should distract myself by seeing other people) and he is genuinely the only high value man I know. He’s a professional athlete (now semi retired) and we’re both 28. He doesn’t watch pornography, believes in 99% of the posts on FDS and thinks women should be brutal when vetting men as men tend to be misogynistic/violent/manipulative. He is absolutely wonderful and basically dedicates his whole life to me and my goals (he happily invested all his money into helping me establish my career as an author) and literally won’t even eat if I can’t eat, like if I’m fasting for a blood test etc. He is used to the spotlight but takes a backseat role atm so that I can achieve what I want in my life, as usually I am in front of the camera, so I tend to like the spotlight myself. He is vehemently against porn, prostitution, casual sex (didn’t have sex til we were committed) and supports radical feminism (but understands he can’t be a radfem bc he’s male). He’s strongly against the trans movement and women losing our private spaces but he never talks over me when I speak about similar issues. He shuts his friends down when they’re being misogynistic or sexist and will sit with me all day if I’m unwell, and actively caught covid when I did so I wasn’t the only one suffering in Paris 😂 We cook together and he does all the cleaning and takes care of my kittycats; he thinks 50/50 relationships are ridiculous. I’m surprised he exists. Been together 3 years, still no red flags other than being super close to his mum? If that’s a red flag at all.

I am currently dating a man I met IRL (I don’t do OLD). I vetted him through multiple conversations, several dates, phone calls and text. Still vetting. We are 1yr apart in age, similar educational background, very different careers but earning approx the same. I met him at an art festival. The city I live in is mid sized. He approached me. He has paid for every date we’ve been on. I like this guy (so far). The dates are fun and are planned according to both of our schedules. We both work full time and have separate hobbies and interest. No red flags yet. He’s intelligent, attractive, doesn’t use drugs, drink or smoke, and works out and eats healthy most of the time; very similar to me. Feel free to ask me questions if you have any. Been dating since April, and I haven’t slept with him yet.

I met mine on bumble ( I know I know) This was actual pre FDS. I would say he's a hvm and I really don't throw that label around. Met when I was 29. He's three years older. He still takes me on dates once a week and always pays when we go out for little things. Never goes 50/50. Fixes my car. Takes care of stuff around the house. Cleans more than I do and pays for a cleaning lady to come once a month for a full house cleaning. Has lots of hobbies like working on cars and building things and physical hobbies to stay in shape. Eats very healthy and does the majority of grocery shopping but still indulges my take out cravings. Currently building a tree house in our back yard. All my friends like him and my single friends use him as an example of what they would like in a boyfriend ( not in a sketchy way). If we broke up or something was to happen to him I'd most likely just be content being single. He's set the bar very high in how I expect to be treated.

Try letting people you know that you are looking? A referral from someone who absolutely cares about you might yield a match.