Struggling with a contradiction

HVM date their own age.

So, if you're older, a little shit who wants to date you is probably ticking the "cougar" box.

And old dudes who game or even cOmMit tO young women are obviously despicable.

The way I see it, there's simply different pros and cons at any age, there's no objectively "better" time. It depends on what's important to you personally.

When we're young, we're less discerning, and we don't know what the guy will become in the future. Sure, the possibilities seem endless at this point, but the flip side of that is, there are also so many more opportunities to mess up our lives by getting with a guy who "seemed great at the time".

As we age, yes of course the pool gets smaller. It's not just because the number of men available get smaller, it's also because we tend to be in a more stable place in our lives, we have clearer ideas of what we want, so that narrows things down, too.

When people say "the good ones are taken", that's turning a lot of blind eyes to how many bad ones are also taken. Example: I don't want the type of guy who gets himself a starter wife mostly because he wants the appearance of being one of "the good ones". That's important to me. So as far as I'm concerned, it's a big plus that it gets easier to spot those guys at my age.

More leaps of faith are required to get with a man while young, because no one really has a crystal ball to see into the future. At older ages, it's more of a process of elimination 😆

If you want more selection, then okay, earlier would be better in that case. I want to know what these guys are like after I can just about see their "final form", so for me, later is better. I'm never in a rush, because "marry in haste, repent at leisure."

"there is a general consensus here that as you get older, the harder and harder it is to find an HVM"

Don't worry about offending us with ideas that aren't even that radical. Your observations are accurate.

As men get older, the herd (if there was even a herd to begin with) of HVM thins. That is the hard truth.

I don't have a definite answer to your question, but I do think the solution may be something people of both genders don't want to hear: if you want to maximize your chances of finding an HVM, you may not want to wait too long.

An FDS-aligned woman from another forum said, "Men below age 25 are largely trash. Men above age 35 are largely trash."

In big cities, you can extend the upper limit to 40.

Realistically, if you want an HVM who doesn't have a lot of baggage, it might be in your best interest to find him when you are both aged 25-35.

You can find HVM at any age, but it gets a lot harder when you're very young or past age ~40.

As you get older, you’re in a stabler position to choose a man worthy of your time. You’re less likely to get manipulated by an older man due to your wisdom and experience.

HVM only date HVW. Ergo, you need to spend that time building yourself up to find someone worthwhile.

Yes, people come with baggage, and an older HVM will have baggage of his own, but it’s how he manages it that is important.

People change a lot in their early 20s, so even if you find a HVM at 22, you may end up growing apart later, or he may age badly and become a disappointment in his career, maturity, fitness, etc. I leveled up around age 27 so I’m biased, but I think late 20s is a good time to look for a serious HVM life partner. You can see a man’s career prospects, adult physique and hair, how he arranges the rhythm of his life, etc. Too early and you’re committing to a boy who hasn’t finished growing up, not a full-fledged HVM. And we don’t choose boys based on their potential to mature into HVM.

I'm against marrying young because as SereneQueen stated, people change a lot in their early 20s. I'd go further to state that the adult brain does not reach full maturation till the age of 25. That is to say the area in charge of reasoning, planning, impulse control (the prefrontal cortex) is not fully cooked. You can see where this is going right? This can lead making wrong choices/poor decisions, and lacking the ability to discern whether a situation is safe - missing some possible big red flags.

Factors further influencing development mental growth of a healthy neural network are drug use, trauma and genetics. This is also an age of experimentation for many so its better to find someone after they've gone through this stage to see where the chips fall (and if they go bald, bald scrotes can die mad). Also, after 25 is when you'll start to see important life decisions being made, so it's hard to avoid being Barbara the builder when they are still discovering themselves.

There are circumstances when marrying young is positive, usually when both are close in age. If they come from a background where they have a lot of support getting established financially then it has promise. It's still high risk, possibly higher risk because when we are new adults we are dumb about a lot of things but that's also why it can work. Our culture and economy don't support this type of structure as much anymore but there are still some people who have it. There is no absolute right or wrong formula. There are situations that often go one way or another. That is why it is discouraged. Me being a young bride would have been bad because I was ambitious. But I a,so wants a family and home young so I would have had to give one up to have the other. And it still did t work out like I hope. I feel no guilt about this because the idea that following such a traditional model is the key to happiness and success is propaganda and usually not true. Many men who marry too young get freaked out and leave or sabotage after they have children. It's far worse to be yong with children and a young husband run for the hills than to be older and more established and have to toss his butt out.