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Hello sisters!
To give you some context, I joined the corporate world around 7 years ago when I joined a tech company.
While I've been a key stakeholder and all the teams I worked with only had great things to say about me and my work, my direct team was a nightmare.
It was an all women's team and I was the only one not british/American which I think, along with my non-assertive attitude, never made them see me as an equal. My business stream was the most successful, and the friends of the director that got promoted along the years took over my thing basically stealing my work and credits and refusing to give me any opportunities for growth.
It was when I started putting the foot down and being assertive that the real problems started and it got unbearable.
I have found a new job and I was wondering if anyone has any tips on how I should present myself?
I know there's a podcast episode and I took a lot of information from it back then but feel it was geared more towards other kind of things in the workplace, especially male perception, which is not what's worrying me in this specific case.
I am joining for a highly experienced role and I am probably the most experienced aside from the director (man). The idea is to basically apply the strategy to my new area and then grow to a management role to have my own team.
I know I transmitted the right confidence during all interview steps, but now that I'm joining the team officially, I worry in the back of my mind that if I am too nice/too helpful/too '😊' that they might take advantage of me too. I also look way younger than I am, which also doesn't help with how people perceive my experience.
What kind of attitude should I have on my first week when meeting the team?
FDS has taught me a lot about the way you present yourself on dates - but what about work and when the other person isn't necessarily a man?
I'll be honest and say I think that because corporate is so competitive that women are pushed to mawl each other and my question is more geared towards presentation to other women's perception. Any tips will be greatly appreciated!
I truly feel like there's no one way you can "win" as a woman in the workplace. Most people are going to nitpick and think of your behavior as "never quite right" because they have a hard time accepting a woman's confidence and experience. Do your best, of course, but don't take responsibility for other people's reactions and opinions which are colored by bias more than anything. You don't have to "prove" yourself to anyone who doesn't see your worth. Like in dating, strong boundaries are your best bet. But you can't control other people's perception.
Please go to the podcast called women at work by Harvard business review. Binge everything possible.
The first thing that comes to mind is aim to be respected, not liked. Don’t be afraid of seeming serious and opinionated. Resist the typical female default of being people-pleasing and agreeable. They hired you because you know best - now use that knowledge and authority to do things your way! I also look young and when the situation calls for it, I tend to dress more formally. I work in tech too and feel like fancier hair/makeup has the ability to convey age, but it doesn’t fit me or my work environment. See how you can tweak your appearance to look and feel more senior. Kudos on this new job and I’m sure you’ll excel 👏