Quick question as I start to date for the FIRST time in my life...

The younger you start dating, the more you make certain mistakes. For example, teenagers and younger women often go through a phase when they think sleeping around is cool and fun (spoiler: it's not). Also, younger women can be less cynical and critical of men, leading them to accept a lot of scrote behavior.

I understand that you feel behind your peers, but I think youre actually in a great position. Because of your age you're a little more mature than most people when they start dating, and that will more than balance out your lack of experience. Plus, you found FDS. My god, I wish I had FDS when I was dating in my 20s.

And I truely believe it would benefit all women to delay dating until around 27. Whats a teenage girl need to date for? She should be focussing in herself and having fun. Boys will only drag her down.

I was pretty sheltered about this stuff too, and a late bloomer.

• It won't be like the movies, so don't expect that

• Always ask yourself how you benefit from keeping him around

• Don't let him know your inexperience/naive nature

• Don't feel pressure to do anything for the sake of doing it

• You're not missing much by not having dated and there's nothing wrong with you

• You're the prize, so remember that

• Vet him hard and don't give him the benefit of the doubt

• Actions over words

• Don't do wife shit for a bf

• When in doubt, dump him

• 99.9% men are not HV, so the chance of him being the one is unlikely. Don't sacrifice anything for romance because it's a scam for women. Just dump him

• Listen to any niggling feeling and don't gaslight yourself

I know this much:

1. Don't tell guys about my inexperience.

2. Meet in a safe, public location on dates with a FaceTime call beforehand.

3. Don't rush sex.

But, I guess I'm not looking for practical advice (I've read a TON here and forums elsewhere), but that emotional/mental aspect I'm talking about in my post. How to "catch up" and still have a healthy, enjoyable dating experience.

I’m in the same boat as you for the same reason. Actually; I was the same age as you when I started dating. All I can say is you learn fast. By waiting you dodged a lot of bullets like being used for sex for over a decade. You still will get guys with baggage, guys who lovebomb, guys who will push for sex, but it will be less blatant than when you were younger. I had fds when I started dating and it helped so much. It’s funny when I was like you and I started I was so much more excited to date and now that I’ve had some experience I understand women a lot more who kind of naturally play it cool - they play it cool because they doubt guys intentions because they have experienced guys lying to them before. Just know that all the advice you see in the handbook is true and based off experience of thousands of women, even if it it sounds stupid. You really need strong boundaries to date, so never drop your boundaries and always follow your gut.

From my 30-something perspective:

You are so lucky you missed out on a decade (maybe more) of dating trash boys and men. And you are so lucky to have FDS before you start dating. I wish FDS had existed for me when I was in my teens and 20s.

I've said this before, and I'll say it again:

Boys/men under age 25 are mostly trash. Single men over age 35 are mostly trash.

At 27, you're in a great place. Assuming you date age-appropriately, your chances of finding an HVM are the highest at your current age.

If any man makes you feel weird/inadequate about being inexperienced, just block and delete.

Try to be careful and don't agree to anything you're not comfortable with; get to learn the person first like you would a friend, just to know what their character is like. People usually only show their bad sides later, when they start to feel comfortable.

You haven't missed much dating-wise, because it can be very hard to find a good person right away especially when you are younger. You are older and wiser now so you can actually make better judgement on people and you won't be making the mistakes you'd be making if you were younger and met a bad guy.

Also a side note: we are very much capable of catching up if we get behind in life, so as long as you keep moving forward you will catch up. You don't need 15 years worth of time to catch up to life. So just keep putting yourself out there (as much as you feel comfortable) and being in social situations, and you will eventually accumulate enough experience and catch up. :) Good luck in your journey 💛

If you pay attention to old people they often regret their promiscuous phases or they become devout Christians to try to erase it. You never see old people bragging about being a player or how many bodies they have because it's actually shameful and shows they didn't value their own bodies and treated sex like an obligation. Usually people are promiscuous because they're coming from generational trauma of their family being very easy and open with sex. It's pathetic because like imagine someone who was touched starved and they were attempting to hug strangers to stop their loneliness - it feels icky because it shows they don't love themselves and no one showed them how till it's too late. Sex toys are 20xxxx times better than most lvm don't be ashamed of not being promiscuous or not as "ahead".

All the advice on here is fabulous!

I’ll just add to join your local “Are We Dating the Same Guy” Facebook group, and ask the group about every man you meet & are interested in.

I was shocked to see the same scrotes pop up over and over again. And a few of my ex-dates (scary dudes!). The most toxic men really get around and are usually the most aggressive.

Lean on your local sisters for advice.