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First, thanks for creating this site! I know it takes a lot of work and planning.
I just left a long-term marriage. OMG, the emotional and psychological games.
I ghosted (yep, middle of the night with only the possessions I could fit in my car). I know it's pathetic, but sometimes I feel like I left a puppy tied to a tree in the woods (guilt), yet I know he's a grown-ass man who chose to play games every. single. day.
I'm posting here to break my own inertia (I just wasn't sure where to begin as far as a sub-forum...please let me know if there's a better place to start).
I did enough work during the relationship to know I did the right thing and shouldn't feel guilty. Still, any encouragement is appreciated.
Thank God you got out.
You shouldn't feel the least bit guilty about ghosting. If he just wants to play emotional games there's no telling what he would have done if he knew you were walking out. You had to take the right step for yourself and you did it! Welcome to this site, I think you'll find a lot of love and support among this awesome group of ladies!
In the end, you have to walk with your head held high. Let yourself off the hook for the ghosting. You did the best you could. Now walk forward with confidence. When life brings you the next challenge, you’ll be stronger.
Don’t feel guilty. You prioritized yourself. There’s nothing wrong with that <3
@Blossom_Dawn - thank you so much! Yes, OMG, the games. It was out of control.
What helped me so much was to stay cool, lean back, and observe so that I could see exactly what I was dealing with. I woke the eff up.
I have a pretty big investment with this man (we split everything 50/50, but he probably thinks it's all his). I found an attorney that I like, so he can deal with him going forward.
Through the entire marriage, I stayed really fit, however, I was under-eating. So, I hired a health coach and have been fully nourishing my body (and soul). After 6 months, I'm feeling stronger and eat enough calories each day (1800 to 2200 calories a day, yum!). I started lifting again yesterday, yay! #levelup :)
I hope you're feeling more comfortable with your decision now. You ahve your best days ahead of you, you don't need someone dragging you down. Growing into a new you is painful and intimidating at first, if you work on it day by day though and take things one step at a time you'll find yourself achieving your goals in no time.
Thanks @Blossom_Dawn hugs back to you!