Men Who Claim they Were Raped

When men get raped, it is almost always by other men. Woman on man rape is an anomaly, because men can very easily overpower women. So, my response to a scrote that felt he had to tell me this from the jump would be "Yes, men are so violent, aren't they?" In other words, I can't really bring myself to care about some tall tale told to try to elicit a sympathetic response from me. And if a man WAS truly raped, then he would feel the deep shame associated with being a victim of sexual assault, and would not be dropping that information on strangers, who could be careless with it.

Chances are he's lying, according to Lundy Bancroft.

Men don't reveal info like that about themselves to women they want to date/impress. It's a lie to manipulate women. Run

I don't trust people who tell things like that to a person they barely know. It's most likely a thinly veiled attempt to manipulate you into pitying them and paint themselves as the victim, especially if he claims he was raped by a woman (and it was not sexual abuse by an adult woman when he was a child).

A woman overpowering a grown man and getting him to maintain enough of an erection to rape him seems pretty unlikely... not completely impossible, but highly unlikely. And then there's still the issue of why he would tell that to you. What does he have to gain? This is completely different than telling your spouse of 20 years about your childhood abuse.

Some men think and view themselves being raped by a woman as the biggest compliment. For a woman to want him so much that she wanted to rape him. It's pure projection obviously because women dont view sex like that and men cant be overpowered or at least maintain a hard on if they didn't really want it. Let's be real men have no issue faking rape and falsley accusing ppl since thats what they project 24/7 on women

makes me want to roll my eyeballs, to be honest

I never trust any scrote who claims to be raped or abused in some way in the past. Any man who talks about how he got his ass whooped as a child into a bloody pulp, getting sexually assaulted, etc, always end up becoming the biggest abusers themselves in the end. It is extremely rare for a man to be telling the truth about prior abuse, and in fact, genuine male victims and survivors have a tendency to not want to talk about it much because it still hurts or it makes them feel ashamed/guilty in general.

I think it's rapist red flag. Men who talk about rape in general early on are LITERALLY waving red flags they are rapists. The guy who SAd me talked early on about "false allegations" a girl had made that were "ruining his life". I was like oooo nooo you poor man. He full on violently assaulted me when I said no, there was no grey area. Maybe he got molested in childhood or raped but that's for therapy. And I hate to say it but men who were sexually abused are a lot more likely to perpetuate the abuse into children or others instead of end the cycle. Literally run for your life.

The reason it's so scary is because he's trauma dumping (is probably a lie too) in order to sniff out women who empathize with him. He's literally trying to sniff out vulnerable women who have been raped in the past. He will turn on them. That's how rapists and abusers in general operate. They don't target the people with family support, friend support and happy childhoods. They target the weak, broken down and isolated.

I believe them if it was by a man or if they were a child but I don’t believe men who claim they were raped by a woman as an adult.

from the jump? suspicious. no victim would openly reveal their trauma in that manner.

Men who claim they were abused by a woman are in many cases the abusers themselves. It's a giant red flag. If he is a true victim, he won't volunteer that info so brazenly and put on a tortured sadboi show for sympathy points. How many times do these types say "actually I was raped too you know" in a chagrined voice IN RESPONSE to a woman saying she experienced sexual violence / that men are more dangerous on average? They just want to play the victim card too because they assume female victims get all the support and attention. Lol. Actual victims know about the gaslighting and invalidation that happens when you speak up and don't live in a fantasy land where you're showered with flowers and get well cards. My boyfriend did suffer some emotional abuse from his ex-wife but he doesn't call it abuse, readily empathizes with her, struggles with being angry at her, shows signs of hypervigilance, can tend towards people pleasing, and only opened up about the full extent of it slowly over time. These are all hallmarks of actually being victimized and treated badly, and it's stuff I observed from the outside and that he didn't have to point out (if he did it would have been sus)

I don't think they're really projecting, I think they're just outright making it up and are lowkey an MRA in disguise (unless it was rape by another man and they were young or something, but even then I'd raise an eyebrow if they mentioned it in any context other than a very intimate relationship or something where that kind of self-disclosure's appropriate).

Rape is horrible but all male pedophiles and rapists are like that because they have been raped themselves. Men who have been raped have my sympathy and support like all female victims but I would never trust a man who has been raped with children.

Never in my history of social work did a man disclose his SA early on - it wasn’t until a lot of trust was built, and even then, they didn’t want to talk about it. Men really struggle with processing shame.

Men who offer that information from the jump are likely to be lying to trauma bond with you or they’re experiencing psychosis, and very little in between.

Disclaimer - This is purely speculation from observation and anecdotal evidence, and I don’t claim this as fact - though I’m fairly certain I’m on the money;)

I was listening to a podcast on overcoming trauma, and the hosts would interview guests to talk about their own journeys with trauma and therapy (for the record, I’m fine with someone sharing their own trauma in the appropriate context, like for this type of podcast, or within a therapy group).

One interviewee was a man talking about his experience being molested by an older neighbor boy when he was a child, and his experiences with therapy and how his relationships with people were affected. One story he told (which he seemed to view as positive, but which horrified me) was about attending a “get to know you” exercise as part of a theater course he was taking, where they had everyone stand in a circle and the professor would ask a question, and everyone for whom the question was true would step into the middle of the circle (you can see where this is going). Well, the professor asked how many people had been victims of sexual assault, and this guy describes stepping into the middle of the circle with a few other people, and how cathartic and freeing it was, and he said “I wonder how many other people there could have also stepped into the circle, but were too afraid to,” like he felt sad for people who had boundaries. And the two hosts were like “wow, good for you” and “what a powerful experience”. Meanwhile, all I could think about was how inappropriate it was for a professor to ask that kind of question in that kind of exercise (I’m very wary of those exercises anyway, but… theater people…), and expect people to expose their own trauma for complete strangers.

Even if it is true (which I would doubt, unless it happened to him as a child, or he was raped by a man), it seems so strange to just tell someone you barely know about it. Seems like he’s using validation from other people in place of therapy.

I think it’s possible for anyone to be a victim and still be a piece of shit.

That being said, I’m sure there will come a day where men feel perfectly comfortable lying about rape.

Regardless of what happened to this guy, I don’t have an ounce of sympathy for him.

A lot of traumatized men are toxic

why the fuck would you go around telling everyone that lol