Matched with this guy on Hinge and his response about thinking for a day because he drank too much gave me the absolute ICK. I don't want to reply however am I being too hard? (I'm in purple and he's in grey)
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I think he's setting expectations low with this message, that's for sure. Why else would he admit to "drinking too much" during the workweek? Why not just choose a day?
I'm sober, but even when I was still drinking socially, a guy who drinks during the week would be a red flag (to me, personally). Especially a guy who drinks so much it's affecting his ability to make decisions... that energy is not compatible with a high value life and partnership.
Listen to your gut, especially if the "ick" is this loud. 😬
"let me think and pick a day".
He sounds very wishy washy. Why did he ask you when you were free if he didn't know what day he wanted to meet up?! I can't help but think that a man who was into you would have asked when you were free and then said "How about [day] at [time]?". His passivity bothers me more than the drinking comment TBH but maybe that's just me. I can't stand passive, indecisive men.
Him drinking too much this week is an indicator that he is an alcoholic or a moron who wastes his time drinking. Drop him
NEVER date an alcohol junkie, I'm serious. That's a massive red flag, as most of domestic abusers are alcoholics
It sounds like he will get back to you, but this usually ends up with him ghosting you.
In his mind, he already has picked out a day and wants to see if your available. If you’re not, no worries there are other girls who are available and are going to take your spot.
I see it as never about him working around your schedule, but about him and his schedule.
To test this theory, I would respond not respond until he comes up with plans. Give him 3-5 business days, if he hasn’t responded, it’s likely that he never will, or he’ll get back to you once he’s exhausted his options (which is equivalent to 3-5 business days).
With Hinge, my thoughts are that these types of guys operate on efficiency and they use their chat feed as a checklist and circle back to each girl. If they don’t like any of them, they cross them off their feed, and move on to the next one.
I visibly cringed at his response. 🤢 I’m not someone who drinks much, only really for special occasions every now and then, and then it’s really just a drink or two. So I could be biased in that way, but personally I think you could be doing so much more with your time than apparently drinking too much. 😕