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I told him I am not really into coffee dates and that I would like to do something more creative. He immediately apologized and suggested taking me to a fancy Japanese restaurant and a candle night concert too happening at the end of the month instead!
I'm so happy because I stood my ground and this guy did exactly what he needed to do by apologizing and offering to take me somewhere much nicer. Between dating apps and cultural norms where coffee/beer dates are normalized, I've never been able to do this before. Thanks FDS
Good job maintaining a boundary! Just keep vetting in case he tries to get you to accept more low-effort dates in the future. Don’t forget that a coffee date was his default option, and he’s probably gotten plenty of women to accept that before. It’s always a yellow flag to give feedback and let a man correct himself, but sometimes it works out. I hope you enjoy delicious sushi and beautiful candlelit music!
Well done! I know FDS is generally against educating men on proper dating etiquette, but to me the coffee thing has become a gray area. Most men will use it as a way to cheap out, but there are some men who have been taught that women prefer coffee dates for safety reasons (daytime, less pressure). Now the real test will be if he pays for the dinner and concert. That is one area where I don't think men deserve to be educated - it's pretty obvious that if a man asks a woman out he should pay.
Ice cream dates are the same as coffee dates right? I had a dude ask me out for ice cream. It's a no for me.
Keep your guard up. Coffee was his preferred default, which means he’s acting against his usual nature to impress you. Keep vetting him and don’t let yourself get attached.
Would love to hear a future update!
Go girl. That's how it's done. Don't forget to be plenty busy and make him schedule around your many "other commitments and hobbies". It never hurts to have a scrotation.
I'm not sure why you're cheering.
He tried to lowball you with a cheap, lazy coffee date. You should have just said no and deleted and blocked.
Please STOP telling these scrotes the issue and "teaching" him to correct it - you're just telling him how to pretend to be