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Hi Queens! Lately I’ve been thinking about where exactly to draw the line between chasing and letting him know you are interested.
If you don’t show any interest in the man/the men you are dating, or very little, a HVM will respectfully stop persuing you, because he respects your feelings and the signals you put out.
So to be more spesific, how and when it is apropriate for a HVW to show a guy, that she is interested in him and that he is welcome to persue her?
Any thoughts on this ladies?
This question is confusing. An HVM initiates and you respond. If he's not initiating, you don't have to do anything. You shoudn't have to initiate anything. If he isn't doing anything, he's not into you.
It's not as if you really need to give men a push into pursing someone or something that they want.
I know it's hard because it's human nature to think that taking action will fix or hurry along a process. But ultimately you don't control a man's initial interest.
Tactics that I use are not showing interest per se but rather indicating that I am open for pursuing and to be honest I do it regardless of circumstances & time unless I am in professional capacity.
I carry on as usual but add a bit of fleur to it like smizing or using other traditional feminine body language but NEVER in excess. Natural femininity and reading clues is key. In most cases that is more than enough when man is interested, if not then he is not that much interested. I just go on with my life.
You’re right that there has to be balance. You don’t want to be showing NO interest (being impolite, inconsiderate) but you most definetly DON’T want to go the extreme and end up pursuing either. I think just being genuine in your reactions but not going over the top and def not try to impress him. For instance, if he brings up a topic and you like what he is saying you would ask follow-up questions, and being actively present in the conversation. All the stuff you would normally do but not going “ga-ga” over him. Another example- if he gives you a gift, does something nice for you, you would genuinely receive the gift and say “thank you” and smile (SayNad has a great post on how to genuinely receive gifts).
But overall as a HVW we show interest by our time and energy we spend with a man we are courting. If he is doing well he gets the privilege to see us and continue to date us. He sees we are interested as we keep accepting his invitations. We still keep our life busy so it’s not like he’s the center of our world. But we will respond the appropriate amount to his date requests. We show we don’t have interest by ending the courting process.
Thanks for your replies ladies! I get what you write Renard about indicating that you are open for pursuing, rather than showing clear interest. After all HVW aren’t really interested before they have proven themselves. Would you care to share more spesifically how you would indicate that? Runner_Woman yes! You don’t want to be impolite or too short in your replies. But what you said about being genuine in your reactions and not trying to impress, is very well frazed. You see the reason I ask is because I travel a lot for work, I’m active in sports, have an active friend circle + family commitments. So I have very little time for dating overall. Weekends are always reserved for friends, family and cultural events. This means I sometimes have time for a date every three or four weeks. Like «I’d love to go out, but I can’t any of the three dates you proposed, how about next month?» Which I understand might come over as «not interested».