How to detect a pickme

Pickme:

• supports the trans movement

• victim blaming

• unpleasant double standards e.g. criticises beautiful women for petty stuff, but doesn’t call out men for obvious misdeeds

• pro sex work but is also smug if others have done it when she hasn’t (hypocritical views)

• all of her posts are thirst traps of herself (I had alarm bells about a woman like this years ago - shouldn’t have ignored it)

• doesn’t post pics with other women or only posts the photos where you look bad

• cheap - like LVM - will complain about spending money when you go on outings, but will splurge with others when they need to socially perform

• fake persona with men around - suddenly smiles more, maybe pretends to be your best friend in front of men to look popular

A pick me will bring up misandry if someone brings up the topic of misogyny. They'll have a cringey cool girl /low maintainence vibe. They'll always agree with or take mens side over you , including the trivial things. It's like a knee jerk reaction to them, they'll automatically agree with the man or sweep in to defend him. They'll defend porn. Sometimes they will be promiscuous or crave male attention but not always. You have "I'm one of the boys" pick Mes and the desperate chasing after men and paying for the dates pick Mes.

I don't think there's any easy way to reveal a pick me. IMO the only way to find out if a woman is a HVW or a pick me is to just get to know her slowly. If she is a pick me, she'll reveal it soon enough. I guess you could try bringing up topics like porn or the sex trade e.g. "I hate that so many men these days watch porn and it's become so normalised", and see what she says. That's the only "trick" I can think of.

Here's a few with some real life examples I've encountered:

1) Treats men better than women and with more respect than women.

2) Internalized misogyny. Values men's opinions more than yours. My brother introduced me to FDS. I tried to pass on the advice to a female cousin. She ridiculed me. When my brother gave her the same FDS advice, she ate it up and agreed with him then told me she finally understands where I'm coming from. We said the exact same words to her 🤣

3) Pays for men on dates/ Splits 50/50.

4) Craves male validation. Prioritizes and chooses men over women (unfortunately most women are socially conditioned to do this). I've visited a now ex-friend abroad who would hookup with men on our nights out and ditch me when I literally traveled to a different country just to see her. She's now derailed her degree and career because she's always chasing male validation and these men have derailed her life. She hasn't learned her lesson. She's a few years older than me so she's now 30 and still doing this. She had a crush on her uncle and got jealous when she found out than he had a gf.

5) You're afraid to bring her to family events/ out with friends because she constantly£ucks up the group dynamic by hitting on/£ucking all the guys.

6) Jealous and constantly comparing her physical appearance to yours. Like once in a while if she wears the wrong outfit to a place I get it. But if she's always insecure it's a red flag. Healthy women know there's always women who are hotter, richer and more successful. They don't waste time comparing and are happier improving themselves as best they can and are inspired by other women who may be better at something instead of jealous.

7) Introducing you to any guy who's beneath your standards.

8) Flirting with taken men.

9) Posts liberal/ regressive leftist posts on social media but then has opposite values in real life. l was very close to a cousin who always posted pro woman stuff but would then shamed me when I opened up about my experience with narcissistic abuse and physical violence at hands of a man. She shamed for not "just getting over it." Because he's not around anymore. I definitely didn't expect such a lack of empathy. I'm still afraid of men.

10) Lives with a man before marriage. This is giving men wife benefits for girlfriend prices.

Me personally (assuming you're vetting a stranger and can only use weird signals to see if someones a pickme without knowing much about them.)

• Not listening to anything you say about your personal life because you're not a guy. May even interrupt you to talk about themselves or just change the subject because they're scared of intimacy and they don't see you or themselves as people so they don't like to talk about hard things because that reinforces the opposite conditioning.

• Will bring up random guys in the middle of nowhere or hit on ugly scrotes In public, even checking them out is kinda sus, then they get mad when you don't join checking out the ugliest dude on the planet.

-if they put too much work into being attractive to hetero males it's (kinda) a sign of being a pick-me. Like dressing up, hair / makeup done just to go to a gas station/gym/ grocery store.

- If they think everything is embarrassing or if it doesn't make them look good it shouldn't exist.

- Can't be happy when you win and instead get deeply jealous instead of humble and supportive.

-thinks they need to fit certain "feminine" boxes in order to be a woman, aka deliberately holding themselves back or being useless af because they think it's feminine and cute, in the end they want you to pay for everything because prince charming didn't come along. Once you tell them to carry their own and pay for their own shit they panic because they've held themselves back hoping something would save them from adulthood and responsibilities (which literally never works so don't anyone try that.)

Like if I burp or laugh at a bar and the woman I'm with is too busy caring about her appearance to strangers instead of eating the 90$ food and drinks then yeah they tend do be pickmeish. Especially when the bars already loud and everyone else is talking.

Essentially if you sense aggressive insecurity or helplessness. Which can be a lot of women.

My personal check boxes tbh, they're obviously not perfect but they work for me. My personal approach is introducing FDS to atleast the decent women and ghosting the rest who don't want help. Sometimes they just need a push despite it not being our responsibility to fix their lives.

Accepting of every single kink because she doesn't " kink shame" I saw an "are we dating the same guy" post the other day of a man where women were commenting about how he's a known rapist. Some women were posting screen shots of his many arrests for SA and one pick me had to point out how he was never actually found guilty of any of the charges. SMH. Like why play devil's advocate and defend a man you don't even know when countless women in the comments are saying how they have been personally SAed by him. Smdh most pick me thing I'd seen in a while.

Sorry if this has been answered already. But a good example of a pickme is when a woman says "You're not going to get a man if you do such-and-such..."

Don't have a filter when it comes to your views, bc it weeds these pickmes out fast! They can't help but be triggered since they're so dickmatized

Ask her what fictional characters are couple goals to her. You'll learn a lot from her answer.