How can an ugly woman get into a fulfilling relationship?

First of all, please read the handbook. FDS women do not settle for men we don't find attractive. If you aren't attracting men of the quality you prefer, then it's your job to stop dating, focus on leveling up, and work on yourself so that you are comfortable enough in your skin to feel worthy of a man who actually interests you. Do not date until you completely and utterly believe that you deserve to date an attractive man. Otherwise, you will surely attract the worst scrotes, losers, and abusers in the dating scene--and you will accept horrible treatment from them because you will believe, deep down, that you deserve it.

As to your attractiveness, Mae West famously said that there are no ugly women, just lazy ones. I'm strongly inclined to agree, and think every woman on the planet can be beautiful in her own way if she's willing to try. If weight is an issue, begin a sensible weight loss plan coupled with cardio and strength training a few times a week. Start small, so it isn't overwhelming, but take charge of your fitness and diet. It could be as simple as merely cutting out sugary drinks/liquid calories and vowing to walk at least two miles a day, every day.

If your skin and facial cosmetics are the problem, go to a store like Ulta, Sephora, or Clinique and ask for a makeup application from someone whose makeup you like at the counter. Drink more water. Stop smoking, if you do, and drastically cut back or abstain from alcohol. Caring for your skin now will pay dividends when you are in your thirties and forties and look much younger than your age.

If fashion is not something that comes naturally to you, there are many blogs out there that focus on being stylish on a budget. Stock your wardrobe with timeless pieces that are flattering on just about everyone rather than flash-in-the-pan trends, although a few trendy pieces here and there will keep you from looking frumpy and older than your years. At 22, with a nice figure, you can get away with just about any trend and look fabulous if you know how to dress yourself.

Finally, I would gently tell you that you are very young, and that you have the rest of your life to worry about men. Take this time instead to focus on meeting your own goals and pursuing your own dreams. How do you see yourself spending your days? Find what you want to do, and relentlessly pursue it. When you are happy and fulfilled in your own life, you will find that the men flock to your beautiful energy and feminine grace. You will attract HVM by default, and by then you will be secure enough in your life that you wouldn't think of settling for a LVM who hurts you.

You are beautiful, Queen. Never call yourself ugly again. But don't let that be an invitation to settle for libfem lies that mediocrity is acceptable and should entitle you to a high value mate. Level up, meet your goals, surpass them--and reap the benefits for the rest of your life. If I'd had FDS mentors when I was your age, my life would have turned out very differently in many ways. How fortunate for you to have this place now!

I'm ugly too (also repeatedly called this by men). I know that there are rules but there are generally written by attractive women. Life is very different for plain to ugly women.

A few things to note relating to your specific question:

1. You can't make yourself find ugly men attractive and why would you want to? The idea that you have to aim low is very male-gaze. The hierarchy in their heads has been normalised but it's completely wrong. It's only valid for unattractive men chasing beautiful women but works for nobody else. You have to ignore the ugly male gaze. That league bs is a league created by ugly men. It's not valid for very attractive men or ugly women.

2. The uglier a man is, the fussier he is so you're heading in the wrong direction anyway. Really good looking men are not fussy. If you look at who bodybuilders date and who male models date, they're rarely dating beautiful women. Even look at the wives of millionaires and billionaires (the men are not necessarily hot though). Those are very plain women. Only Elon Musk and maybe Bezos want model girlfriends. Very attractive men do not need to use women for status or validation because they already have it. Only average, moderately attractive and ugly men do. It also helps that very attractive men tend to be much nicer people.

3. When I was in my 20s, I was VERY forward with men. Had a not been, I would never have had a boyfriend and never slept with anyone. I only went for men I found attractive and who were a little solitary - never when they were with their friends. The key here is not to be desperate. Flirt a little but back off. Once you're used to each other, just be yourself. Keep your appointments with yourself and don't jump at the chance to be with the guy. He's just a guy.

4. As an ugly girl, men (ugly/average men) will assume they can have you and that you want them which is even more of an incentive to never date what I am now calling "untouchable men".

5. Because of no.4 you have to be a bit careful with the "friends" of very attractive men. If they're ugly men then they will try to convince their hot friend that he should be with a hot girl (because that's their dream they assume it's his dream - it isn't). He will need to be very clear with them that you are there to stay.

6. You have youth on your side. Take advantage of that. I did.

7. You don't need to ever settle or apologise for only being attracted to hot guys. Have you ever seen a forum of men trying hard to be attracted to us ugly women? Nope. They don't give a shit about our feelings. They look at hot women and have the audacity to believe they should be with them. Have that same audacity.

Now that I'm 40, I have really lost interest in men and I don't like them as people but at your age I was smitten. My mistake came from not dealing with childhood issues which meant I craved their validation so I was too attached and full on. I could have actually done much better for myself than I did (and I didn't do too badly anyway).

This user is super sketch, Mods. https://www.thefemaledatingstrategy.com/profile/miguelrevenga-d/profile< --- is your name Miguel, sir?

Thats just low esteem talking. Look, unless you got hit in the face with acid, you are probably perfectly normal like 99% of humanity. Id actually look for mental help first. Sounds like your real problem is your shitty family and friends bringing you down. You probably need to find a proffesional therapist to figure it out. If you arent doing basic things like bathing, that can be a sign of deppression. The biggest battles are mental, not physical. Once you sort that part out, most things will fall into place. But first poster is right -no dating until you fix your mindset and you sort out your wants and life first. And set goals beyond dating, like... what do you actually want? Travel? Learn guitar? What career are you interested in? Ask yourself what it is you want that doesnt require being a couple at the present moment.

I don't find the traditional fds script useful here. Facts are I'm attractive and it's gotten me relationship, after miserable relationship. Being a pick-me didn't help obviously, ijs I sometimes wish I wasn't attractive. Creepy scrotes of all ages staring like they're entitled to the thing you are. My opinion is looks aren't everything. What really matters to you? Are you gonna spend 60 years with this guy or are you looking for a fling? Be shallow if you want but if you play your cards right you should be growing old and uglier with this person. I know we are fighting the war against the scrotes and trying to get the material benefits like they do but at some point we need to spiritually level up and realize that a relationship of love is more than the surface things. Make sure he treats you right and doesn't look down on you and think you're less than for being ugly. That's who you want. A kind hearted, good, genuine hvm ugly guy, you'd spit in his face? I just done get that but to each their own

We are who we think in our head. If you are going to keep calling yourself that, you will always feel this way. You are beautiful and you have your own unique beauty. Beauty isn’t just the face, it’s how you carry yourself, your confidence, your charisma, your charm!!! Level yourself up for yourself and not for any man. You are so young!

Most FDS people are leaving Reddit but in your situation I recommend sub Vindicta for learning about maximizing your looks. Some of the 'soft' advices I learnt there definitely helped me. Maybe you could use the resources as well

I feel like I have something personally to say about this topic; I recently went through a glow up journey and the way I was treated then vs. the way I am treated now is night and day. I went from being the "just good for sex" girl / the "just another bro" girl, to the "when can I take you out?" / "you are the most beautiful woman I've ever seen" / random compliments on the street girl.

First of all... I did get plastic surgery. BUT! I also always wear a mask, so the effects aren't even noticeable anyway. Ugliness is more a state of mind. After I spent that much money on my face, I started taking rigorous care of it more : better skin care, better makeup, clothes that flatter me, shoes and jewelry, perfume to top it off. I hold myself like an attractive person and I get treated respectfully. Back when I believed I was ugly (due to abuse from my family...) I didn't take care of myself, my hair was messy, I wore baggy clothes all the time, etc. I think this signals to strangers that something is wrong with you, stay away, and if you do approach her, you're a creep who preys on women with low self esteem. Beauty is more of a state of mind.

Being an ugly woman who was just focused on her studies for early adulthood was probably the best thing that has ever happened to me. If I had gotten into a relationship then, I probably would've been a pickme and things would've been worse. I didn't get into any relationships until now. I've seen my average looking (I felt that I was uglier than them) friends get into terrible pickme relationships. As an ugly woman, I had the opportunity to vet guys for their personality and find ones who had depth. Or the opportunity to just be single and also scare off the shallow men. I disagree with "go for your looksmatch" because I don't want to date a handsome and attractive man. 1, I'll constantly be fending off other women. 2, he will be shallow 3, if you date someone who you consider a little below you in looks, he will try to make up for it in effort. (If he doesn't, he ain't worth it. Some ugly men ARE bitter and awful, but others will try for you) I find the security and effort far more attractive than a jawline or abs. Am I a bit of a gold digger now? hmm... haha...I am in my first relationship now at 25... it's well worth the wait. And I feel like growing up ugly has given me character development. And enduring the wait is better than getting into just any relationship early to prove you're likeable / fuckable.

Also, use filters on your face. Every woman is doing it, to where guys see a woman who isn't using a filter as ugly when she could be just normal. If everyone is using filters, you have to use them too just to be normal. If you send photos to a guy, make sure it's got makeup and filters, because he'll likely show it off to his friends who will vouch that she's hot, he'll feel proud about it, and then want to treat you even better.

Of course though, if you wear makeup irl, that's like real life filters and you'll stand out because most women running their errands don't dress up or put on makeup. So there are two ways to stand out, a bad way by not using filters on your photos, and a good way by dressing up and wearing makeup anywhere you go. People are so so so much nicer to me now just going out and about, I can see it as a virtuous cycle and social proof that the more people treat me like an attractive person, the more I believe it also. I know this pretty privilege is time limited, but I wish I had enjoyed it sooner instead of spending the first quarter century hating myself and being invisible / treated poorly. Do whatever you can to unlearn that you are an ugly woman. I am proof of that. I used to think I was the bottom 1% of women. Nowadays I am being treated so well I feel like I am the top 1% in appearance.

People don't believe me when I tell them I used to be ugly. Like, I would post photos online and people would ask if I was a man or "what's wrong with your skin? what is that?" (part of what I got surgery for.) The way I am treated now, people just believe I've always been pretty.