Guy I was seeing moved away. Should I move on?

So I'm not sure if I should just try to move on or continue trying to see this guy. He didn't tell me he was leaving before the first date. I only saw him for about 2 weeks but developed some strong feelings towards him. And now I'm feeling pretty down that he's gone. He moved about 6 hours away and there were some talks about meeting up again in the future but when I asked him recently he said "we will see." I also suggested video chatting and he said maybe he could sometime. His mom passed away and that's why he moved so I don't know if I should just try to give him some space. I'm not sure how fds feels about guys that uses social media but he posts a lot of pictures and uses Snapchat quite a bit.

11 answers0 replies

Comments (11)

Millennialpink2k

Jun 19, 2023

He's not interested in you. Move on.

- he didn't tell you he was moving

- when asked about the future, he replied "we'll see"

- he wouldn't video chat with you

If he was interested, he would make solid plans and put in effort. He's doing nothing.

Drop him and continue on your way. After 2 weeks you don't have strong feelings, it's likely that you've got insecure attachment and that's been triggered.

This guy is giving you zero signs he likes you. Yeet him into the sun.

lauren

Jun 19, 2023

Replying to

Yeah I do have quite a bit of anxious attachment and abandonment issues but I’m working on that. I also people please too much. I told him I wanted to plan soon and he said “we will see” so that kinda tells me what I need to know

Millennialpink2k

Jun 19, 2023

Replying to

Same. Us people pleasers have to be aware of how we emotionally monitor others instead of staying attuned to our own feelings. It takes a lot of practice but gets easier over time

PlainSimpleTailor

Jun 19, 2023

🚩 He said "we'll see" -- that is not the language of a guy excited to see you again

🚩 active on social media and uses Snapchat which f-boys are notorious for

🚩 you developed "strong feelings" after only two weeks and despite him being unavailable --you're not in love, you're triggered

On top of that, his mother passed away so he's likely going through some grief and shouldn't be dating right now. So yes: please move on. He's not available for a relationship.

lauren

Jun 19, 2023

Replying to

Thanks for clarifying some do that and yeah I do see them as red flags. I feel like he is not emotionally available and was making looking for someone to hang out with before he left

cloveryum

Jun 19, 2023

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Replying to

You mean to have sex with before he left.

delishas

Jun 20, 2023

I’ve forgotten what it’s called, but there’s some discussion in this group about unhealthy crushes where you assign good characteristics to your crush in spite of them. That’s what this sounds like to me, and hopefully someone will be able to name it/link to discussions for you.

lauren

Jun 21, 2023

Replying to

Yea I hope so thanks