My ex is blocked and deleted. We only dated for 3 months. I got so bonded to him during that time even though in retrospect he was disrespectful for refusing to wear condoms besides the first time we ever had sex, even though I told him repeatedly how much anxiety it was causing me. In fact I think that's why he dumped me, I started confronting him rather than just absorbing the responsibility and the anxiety. In other words, this is not a man to ever feel negative about because it is a true blessing the trash took itself out. But every single PMS since the breakup I will start crying and feeling bad about myself especially because he dumped me via text message. Then I got my period and it all makes sense. Anybody else get super emotional during pms even over things they logically know are better off gone?
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yes.
our bodies are literally shedding cells and energy from other people, ESPECIALLY THE DEBRIS FROM EX-LOVERS when we bleed.
science will say our serotonin can drop, which is why we sometimes craves carbohydrates and sweet, fattening things. we are trying to self soothe.
we are exchanging energy with people all the time, and our bleed time (and immediately before) is when we can slow down, find solitude and decide what is and isn't nourishing us anymore.
there are a lot of ways to describe what is happening.
i hear you and see you, sis. i dated a guy that i really thought was a good human for even less than your timeframe...i bond quickly and felt like shit when he told me he didn't feel anything anymore (which i recognize is more of a reflection on him, the f*cking psychopath, but that's another story). you all know the story by now, it f*cked up one of my jobs in addition to f*cking with my head + heart and i was sooooo pissed.
time has made it easier...and i accomplished one of my main goals 2 months later, despite the fact that dating him set me back a couple of months.
be gentle with yourself.
you're not alone.
Yes. It has happened regularly enough to me that by this point, when I start spiraling about something dumb I go check my period tracking app and 9 times out of 10 I'm about a week out from period, give or take a few days.
it´s your hormones talking.
delete his number so that you will never feel tempted to text him
Yes 100% this happens to me. If I'm randomly crying but there's nothing to truly trigger it, usually I'll check my calendar and find its due that day or next. Great advice in here to do something nice for ourselves - especially good food and rest!
Uh, yeah, it's very common. These are 'triggers'. Best thing to do, come "that time" is to keep WELL distracted, do thing you love and enjoy and avoid those topics/paths of thought if possible.
The book 28 Days by Gabrielle Lichterman is amazing for getting to know your cycle and planning around it. She also has an app called Hormonology.
I struggle with this a LOT. PMS is horrible and only those who experience it know what an absolute mind fuck it is. Sadly, I have not found a guaranteed way of dealing with it, but I think CBT helps in the long term as well as accepting your crying bursts as though you've planned them as normal functioning during this time rather than attaching them to anything or anyone in particular. Like I try to say to myself: this is just part of the normal schedule of events in the week before my period arrives and it will not last.
Of course if you're struggling really badly or experiencing depression outside of this, you should consult a doctor as PMS makes everything worse.
No, it's pretty much a normal time for me. But I guess I don't have PMS so I can't be that helpful in advice other than to keep track of your cycle on a paper calendar (don't use apps).