Do you think dating was easier in our grandparents and parents generation?

No, my pickme grandmother married an alcoholic, pickme mother dated a divorced scrote. All the aunts ended up with piece of trash and found solace alone. Pickme aunt in her 60’s finally found a high quality man, he’s 60 too with his own company and their relationship was finally wonderful. But because she needs to cater to her scrote son in his 30’s the man ended the relationship because no mother should baby and cook for a man who is a parasite. And she can’t move in with her new partner because otherwise the scrote son has no one to cook and clean for him. Too bad.

In the 1950’s marriage is glorified and even when a woman wants to leave she just needs to make the best of things because she can’t go anywhere. A friend of mine who is older told her that the first 10 years of her marriage the husband was a complete demon and then he made an U turn realising he’s a neglectful bastard and decided to be good to her. She’s married for 20 years and everyone asks her for tips but her only tip is to tolerate everything until he decides to change himself.

Is that a marriage to be happy with ? No. It only seems easier back in the day because women’s voice weren’t as strong as in modern times.

Absolutely not. They were expected to know nothing about sex. The day before the wedding, an older female relative usually told the bride that a man has needs and she needs to fulfill them. Raping your wife was legal in Germany until 1997. There was no contraception and you had to be afraid of getting pregnant everytime your husband wanted to have his "right". As a woman, dating was probably cute (love bombing while eating ice cream, stealing a kiss yada yada) but the aftermath was horrible. There was no internet so you had to rely on the advice of your girlfriends or mothers, who have been brainwashed by patriarchy. There is a russian saying which says "If he hits you, he loves you". Imagine doormat advice was ALL the advice you had access to. Divorce was not an option because your relatives would spit in your face, so you had to tolerate your snoring rapist everyday. I recommend Alice Schwarzer's "Der kleine Unterschied" from 1975. She interviewed women of all wealth levels and ages. One woman said her husband wants to use her body every night and if she refuses, he starts a loud fight to purpusefully wake up their kids.

I think nostalgia is a powerful drug, especially when you never lived during those times. The past had the shittiest of times for women and you can't really overlook that. It doesn't matter if men were even a smidgen better.

There's a movie, Kate and Leopold. It ends with the female protagonist staying in the 1800s to be with her love.

Bullshit.

It was "easier" in the sense that there were way fewer options so you married the boy down the street or in the same town. Since those days, I think women have changed but men haven't. We've been liberated with bank accounts and freedom, but their expectations and contributions to relationships haven't modernized alongside ours. If anything, they expect even more, which makes dating even harder on women.

Absolutely not. Men have always been horrible.

I think I’m some ways it was easier. it was definitely easier for men, since we had rely on them so much. They could do whatever they wanted to us and we’d stay. Divorce looked bad too, but only looked bad for the woman not the man.

Besides that, I think it was easier for men and women because like you said people were more social back then. It was easier for us to meet in a more natural way. Hook up culture wasn’t a thing either. Acting that way back then, we’d call those men pigs, now he have to never judge a man engaging in that. Men also knew that they had to impress us and that we are the prize. This has been lost with modern men, who want everything 50/50

So definitely easier for men back then. But I think there were some good things for women back then too (Just not much)

I hate how these days we can’t call out depravity and we have to be ok with literally everything a man does.

I think the fact that most upper-class housewives were on valium or thorazine, or some other type of sedative just to get them through the day speaks volumes

if someone asked you if you wanted to give birth to 10 children in your lifetime, what would you answer?

my grandmother had 10 children...i don't think anyone ever asked her whether she wanted to or not. i'm sure courtship with my grandfather was fairly short, and divorce was not an option in the Catholic church.

i agree with the posts that say men had it easier back in the day. women have always had to work our asses off to keep life going, to educate the children, to protect each other and natural resources from being destroyed by greedy, degenerate parasites.

It seems like men from days gone by embraced the concept of working.

Many men today *feel* like they are an alpha deserving of the most attractive and sought-after women in existence. At the same time, many of those same men know they lack the intelligence, skillset, and determination it would require to possess the lifestyle of a Prince. So, the pauper life it is then. They would rather do nothing and live off momma/gf than earn an average, honest living.

Now factor in that women are killing it out there. Women represent the majority of college graduates now. Instead of competing with women, they don't even try. See, by just giving up you never really failed...

Define "easier."

Finding a man back then wasn't hard. Finding a GOOD man certainly was. I have an elderly family friend who described her mother's kitchen as "a train station" because all the neighborhood women would gather there to cry after their husbands beat them. This was normal.

I think it would be silly to gloss over things like this, or women not having bank accounts, as if they're minor points. We were literally 2nd-class citizens and chattel with no control over our own lives until very recently.

Also, I've noticed most elderly women are huge pickmes. They have no identity outside of having a man in their lives, are desperate to marry me off, still have no control over their own money, and they have no shame about infidelity. It's bizarre, sad, and pathetic. My grandmother was desperate for male attention even on her deathbed at age 95. You can see how life before feminism really twisted women and stunted their growth.

Dating culture today sucks for a bunch of reasons. Easy access to increasingly violent porn, plus the fact society still doesn't hold men accountable for anything, means you now have tons of men who simply aren't qualified to be husbands. Society is also lonelier today. We're set up to fail on that front.

I think the real answer to your question is women have changed but men haven't. Men largely still hate women and aren't qualified to be husbands, but we no longer have to settle for it because we have legal rights our ancestors could've only dreamed of.

Dating today is only hard because men still suck and refuse to meet us on our level.

I’m an elder FDSer who had dated for years before social media and cell phones were commonplace, plus I also online dated in its early days circa 1998, and again in recent years I once again online dated. I can tell you in no uncertain terms online dating is now pretty worthless and actively harmful to women in ways it wasn’t even 7 or 20 years ago. The difference is the free 🌽 filmed sexual assault on every male’s phone from the ages of like 10 years old, and the sad notion that “kink” is normal and not a sign of significant trauma and abuse. These are the main changes I’ve watched infiltrate mainstream dating and mating behaviors.

Now women as a class are wising up about the scam of living with a boyfriend or husband. Terms like “weaponized incompetence” and “emotional labor” have become well known to young women, allowing ya’ll to make more informed choices about dealing with men. I’d carefully say things have both gotten better, and worse.

My mom told me that when she was a teenager, during the 60a/70s, girls would inundate magazines with requests for dating advice that would sound like this: "he says he loves me so much and that I have to prove him I love him back by sleeping with him. What should I do?". This was called "asking for proof of love". Women who used to cave, would eventually found themeselves pumped and dumped, or pregnant and slut shamed by the entire community and unable to marry. Draw your own conclusions. Mine is that dating was good only if you were monumentally lucky. Just like today.