Do men ever choose not to date as they wish to focus on their career or academics?

Men can easily stay single and these types are everywhere. They're the avoidant types who don't want a relationship but are perfectly content wasting a woman's time, using her for sex, etc. when it's convenient for them. I think the more appropriate question here is "Do men ever choose not to have sex as they wish to focus on their career..." to which the answer is no.

🤔

I met a guy that believed that he can get married when they’re 45 to a young girl in her early 20’s because they’ll have enough money and resources. I wait to see if he’s successful. So far, he’s managed to date an 18 year old when he was 24 year old. Even though he said it was mutual, I know that she dumped him because she saw the light and he still talks about her even when it’s been 2 years.

Another colleague of mine, kept waiting for the perfect women to show up. He had a nice house and a good job. What he didn’t realize was that in his lifetime was that he had two chances to settle down with women that wanted to be with him.

I’ve also learnt in my thirties, men who wish to focus of studies and academics often struggle a lot with being social. They don’t want anyone around them. As women, if you choose to stay around and help them, they’ll end up wasting your time and sucking the life out of you. Best to not give yourself excuses and excuse his behaviour. The right thing would be to cut your losses and find people who want to be in your presence.

In my experience, even if they say they're not "dating" they're prob in the DMs of serveral girls. They just dont count them as good enough to date, while getting everything they claim to not want. I think they also hookup a lot more easily because they aren't picky. All that while being "single" 🙃

I'm travelling and one of my friends who just had a break up was meeting a couple of girls off apps. The dude is in this city for 4 days max, and still had to be on the prowl. I just bet he wouldn't call that dating.

Using women benefits them and doesn't cost them energy or mental space. Its a matter of usage and benefit. They center women at all.

Yes, but IME it's rare.

One of my friends went to therapy in his 20s and consciously stayed single for 5 years while he worked on himself, then dated with intention until he found his wife.

My brother-in-law focused on figuring out his career before he pursued my sister.

Both of them have good marriages with very happy wives (which is how I rate whether a marriage is good).

But like I said, this is rare. Most men know when they're a dumpster fire but refuse to work on themselves and want a woman to use and fix everything for them. Men have openly told me this.

I feel like guys only say they're focusing on their career and/or academics when they want to end things but don't want to be the jerk. 🙄

The ones who can't find anybody to date do 😂

My late friend is like that, he finished graduate school and settled a job before trying to date. But he's the exception not the rule, because even in general his character is a bit different from the rule, like he genuinely likes to study and I can't find a lot of man like that (known a lot of women like this tho). So maybe there's someone out there but that's not the majority.