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It is a truth universally known that dating apps suck. I wasted considerable time in the first half of 2022 on them swiping through guys I wouldn't go near with a ten foot pole whilst being nagged by pickme friends and family that I need to give people a chance.
I decided to have a brief dating app holiday in the summer....which turned into six months. I felt so much happier without them in my life. However, I'm still on my own with zero prospects of meeting anyone without the apps. I'm very much an introvert but I forced myself to get out a bit more last year with hobbies and that sort of thing but they're not the type that I'd ever meet guys at.
So with that in mind should I go back on the apps? I've read that next Sunday is the busiest day of the year for the apps so maybe I might have a slightly better chance 😅
Imagine you had the opportunity to play the lottery. Except instead of money for a ticket, you had to invest a certain number of days off your life you could never get back. You also had to sign a waiver acknowledging that by participating in this dating lottery, you willingly subject yourself to disrespect, misogyny, and other assorted bullshit, and acknowledge the negative impacts on your mental and physical well-being.
You also must sign a waiver acknowledging the high number of predators on these apps and the lack of social context, making any dates you do go on potentially more dangerous. Also, the lotto entry ticket comes with a disclaimer that the lotto works on an algorithm that will show you only certain men as it sees fit (because it actually does not want you to "win" but to keep swiping).
And lastly, you tried the lotto before and it sucked. You were happier without it. Would you participate, knowing the above? Is the cost to yourself reasonable versus the expected outcome?
Or, would you just keep doing the things you love, and if you meet someone along the way, great?
My advice: Don't gamble with your time, happiness or life.
Not worth it. No HV woman willingly subjects herself to that kind of abuse. And until there are no women left on the apps, it's not going to change. So no, don't go back. Don't give into the false FOMO telling you there might be a diamond somewhere in that landfill, it's not worth it if you come out smelling like garbage.
Unfortunately statistically people meet on dating apps now more than through friends/work/outings. My therapist even told me that you can meet a HVM but it will require proper vetting and a lot of patience just because it’s easier to get more quantity. However, I do not like this idea and told her that I have no interest to subject myself and waste my time and energy vetting men. I do agree that I meet less men and I haven’t gone on any dates since I stopped using dating apps from last year but honestly I have been the happiest. Scrote free and no time wasted messaging back and forth. I decided to just network for my professional growth now instead of focusing on dating and if the right man comes along then I welcome it with open arms.
I'm in the same boat. I deleted them numerous times but without the apps I don't get to meet men.
Yeah, it's good advice to say: get off the apps, but what's the alternative?
How do you meet men without the apps, if it's not through hobbies, friends, out and about or work (which I wouldn't recommend)???
Also, the older you get the harder it is to meet men who are actually single. Dating in your 20's is different to late 30's or later.