Advice needed

@Fed Up Feminist Any time sis! Always remember that a HVM will also be vetting, and he will be mindful of how he comes across. A HVM won’t go over the top with grand gestures, especially when he’s just met you, because he himself knows that’s creepy and way too intense for someone he does not even know. A HVM will work on courting you and will demonstrate his affection appropriately throughout the process. He will spoil you when you’re in an established relationship and he actually has made an effort to get to know you. A HVM is consistent. He actions align with his words. Any man trying to lovebomb is trying to build a false sense of intimacy so you fall for his manipulation and sleep with him as quickly as possible. If you catch yourself falling for it, ask yourself, what are you lacking in your life at that point in time that you feel he is filling that void? (This is a personal question you need to figure out on your own, don’t tell me). The moment you figure it out, go do it for yourself. You are then less likely to fall for grand gestures because you are used to treating yourself so well.

1000% this is a Lovebomb. I have fallen for it more than I care to admit. He's trying to hook you in.

Okay! I'd keep their gifts and let them battle it out. You can weaponize incompetence like men do.

@ClaireBear Right. In my experience, those deep convos are a way that manipulative men gather intel about you. They use those factoids to tailor their behavior to be exactly what you want. Total narc move. To OP, not saying this is the case with you, but be mindful about sharing your insecurities or childhood trauma/daddy issues.

@ClaireBear yes, and even if it's innocent, sometimes it sets up the in-person meeting to be disappointing. Some men are better texters than conversationalists

The one who sent me a gift ended up knowing some of my co workers because we work in the same field. He had them get the item and present it to me. As to the deep convos guy: he has offered to meet me whenever I am ready, it's me who has been dragging my feet as I vet him.

@Fed Up Feminist good to know. Be careful and follow your gut. Regardless of who you may choose, you deserve to be treated like a queen ❤

They both are offering to meet me asap, it's me dragging my feet. I want to make sure they are sane, but more importantly: I had a surgery that occured just as I had met them and the post op healing caused a slow down in social schedule which is the chief reason I didn't meet them yet.