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I am not from a Nordic country but from what I've seen online, the norm in these countries is to split the bill, even on the first date. I have heard that men are socialized more like woman in these countries. Also heard that Nordic men do more household labor than men of other nationalities.
Additionally, the burden of reproduction is lower because it is more equally distributed on society due to the high tax rate. I feel in the US especially, a couple bears the majority of the cost of pregnancy, childbirth, childcare, and education. So perhaps the first date is split because people have already paid into a communal pot of money, some of which is used to support woman?
Maybe because I was born and raised in the US, I find it so hard to believe that Nordic men are doing emotional labor that comes anywhere close to how much the average woman does. But maybe I'm wrong? I would love to hear input from woman in these countries. Do men go 50/50 with you? Do you feel that FDS principles apply to your country?
I have Nordic friends. This is a sweeping generalisation. Patriarchy, male entitlement to women’s bodies, uneven distribution of emotional and mental burden all exists. The “egalitarianism” they push tends to favour males. It’s quite snarky. “Oh you wanted equality right?! So you women can do everything!” They fail to grasp that fighting for equality meant to be treated with equal dignity and given the same social standing as males whilst still celebrating our biological differences and capabilities. Fuck that 50/50 shit. Men can get 50/50 when THEY start shooting babies out of their vaginas.
I'm not from a Nordic country, but not too far off haha. I think it's exactly because women are now expected to fulfill the masculine and the feminine role, working hard at her job but also taking care of everyone's physical and emotional needs, 50/50 is extremely unfair towards women.
Not from a Nordic country. But know a woman who is. And, we broke up our friendship because a couple of times I was late and to make up for it, I paid for the full experiences. She doesn't like it someone shows gratitude. While she also pays for her boyfriend's gas because he has to travel for work as she has work from home. And, oh, she is so understanding that she finds it safe to be around the above said boyfriend's narcotics addicted father at 3AM in their house. Some culture, I must admit. I don't get it at all. Good riddance.
I'm from Eastern Europe, dated some guys from Sweden, they didn't hesitate to pay for dinners, travel etc. I think they know women from Easter Europe are more traditional hence 50/50 isn't appropriate. The Dutch guy I'm currently dating literally asked before our first date if it will be 50/50 because Dutch women, allegedly, are insulted if you attempt to do that. I said no and he has been covering everything ever since. I really don't know if Dutch women really are insulted by 50/50, I think guys just know they can get away with it, so they do. Funny thing is, the guys themselves love to make you happy, hearing a "thank **you** for the dinner" etc, so while I can comfortably support myself, the 50/50 boys are just robbing themselves of feeling like the man, the provider.
I was just listening to this podcast and thought of your post. Have a listen to hear a solid perspective on the state of women’s rights in Norway in particular. https://open.spotify.com/episode/0r3JHQldrgObBIteBJP6Z0?si=lWBMS9t2SXWqCLXXxYGMOg
I tried to answer this earlier, but my long comment apparently didn't get through... So I guess I try again since this topic is something I find interesting.
I'm from Finland and I do agree there is a cultural difference between countries. Of course, I can talk only about Finnish dating culture but I believe it might be very similiar with Sweden and Norway, but for example comparing Estonian culture there is already very different thinking about 50/50.
In Finland I think standard expectation in dates (especially at first dates) is both paying their own food and drinks, but the most important thing is not to make a scene about it. It would be really trashy and arrogant behaviour for woman to expect man to pay, but it's also tacky to argue against it if he's willing to do that. Also, it's very low level behaviour from a man make a scene about it like "I hope you don't expect me to pay".
Also when in relationship, it's commonly expected both taking responsibility about sharing costs and chores. It's quite rare thing to be a house wife or stay at home -mom. Women often have high education and well-paid careers. In my generation men are also expected to take their responsibility in parenting and at least in my social circles fathers actively want to take time off from work for taking care of the baby and after mother is returning to her work, parenting is aiming to 50/50. There was just recently really good change in law making both parents able to have financially supported parental leave as much.
For me it was weird when I started to date a French man and he insisted to take me properly out as our first date and made it clear I'm not going to pay anything. I felt pressure to arrange next dates on me. Well, now we are in relationship so usually the one pays who's taking their card out first. Or if we do something special usually one suggesting it pays. We don't calculate who has paid more often or more expensive stuff, things just go naturally and I think it's about 50/50. We both make a decent money so I don't see any reason to think about that too much. Of course if other one would have financial struggles, I expect in serious relationship the other to compensate.
(Sorry if there's weird typos in text, as said I'm from Finland and english is not my native language.)